


i won't be done

by spacedhowell



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Chatting & Messaging, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining Keith (Voltron), Pining Lance (Voltron), Slow Burn, Texting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-22
Updated: 2019-06-21
Packaged: 2019-08-05 19:36:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 19,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16373750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spacedhowell/pseuds/spacedhowell
Summary: other space dad (09:08)please dont tell me you and lance actually foughti dont have enough money to bail you out of jailsharpshooter (09:09)of course not2007 emo kid (09:09)we settled our grudges like mature adultskiss the cook (09:09)keith came over and they played uno





	1. lucky charms™

**Author's Note:**

> lance - sharpshooter  
> keith - 2007 emo kid  
> pidge - rest in peace rover  
> hunk - kiss the cook  
> matt - power of god & anime  
> allura - princess™  
> shiro - space dad  
> adam - other space dad
> 
> title from "i won't be done" by dodie clark

_**september 18th, 2018** _

_**space rangers**_  

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**sharpshooter (11:32)**

whoever stole the marshmallows from my lucky charms cereal better own up rn

you guys are absolute heathens

i swear

im banning all of you from ever stepping foot into this apartment again

**kiss the cook (11:33)**

Excuse me

Who pays half the rent?

**sharpshooter (11:33)**

ugh fine

everyone BUT hunk

happy now

**kiss the cook (11:34)**

:))

**sharpshooter (11:34)**

anyways

back to the topic at hand

this doesn't have to be a big deal

whoever took the marshmallows

come forward and all will be forgiven

**sharpshooter (11:46)**

smart

you knew i would never forgive you

but you're dumb if you think i wont get to the bottom of this

everyone here is a suspect

**princess™ (11:46)**

youve been watching way too much brooklyn nine nine

**sharpshooter (11:46)**

bold of you to assume there is such a thing as watching too much b99

**2007 emo kid (11:48)**

agreed

**sharpshooter (11:49)**

pidge i swear to god if it was you who stole the marshmallows again

**rest in peace rover (11:51)**

THAT WAS ONE TIME

**sharpshooter (11:51)**

a jaguar never changes its spots

**2007 emo kid (11:52)**

im pretty sure its leopard and not jaguar

**sharpshooter (11:52)**

shut ur mouth young billy ray cyrus

**2007 emo kid (11:53)**

make me

also

seriously? young billy ray cyrus was the best you could come up with?

* * *

_**kiss the cook + sharpshooter** _

**sharpshooter (11:53)**

HUNK

WHAT TGE FUCJ

DID YOU SEE THE TEXT

**kiss the cook (11:54)**

What text?

**sharpshooter (11:54)**

CHECK THE SPACE RANGERS GC

**kiss the cook (11:55)**

Oh

OH

Damn thats rough

**sharpshooter (11:55)**

"MAKE ME"

EXCUSE ME

THAT IS NOT ALLOWED

**kiss the cook (11:55)**

Lance

Relax

He probably meant it jokingly

**sharpshooter (11:56)**

HOW DO YOU EXPECT ME TO GET OVER SOMEONE WHO SAYS THINGS LIKE THAT TO ME

thats it

im suing him

its the only way

**kiss the cook (11:56)**

Lance no

**sharpshooter (11:56)**

theres nothing you can do to stop me

**kiss the cook (11:57)**

Dammit

At least I can say I tried

* * *

_**september 19th, 2018** _

_**2007 emo kid + space dad** _

**2007 emo kid (15:02)**

shirooo

are you free this saturday?

**space dad (15:08)**

Why?

**2007 emo kid (15:09)**

a friend of mine has 2 p!atd concert tickets

but she can't make it because shes busy

so she asked me if I wanted them

and because im trash for brendon urie, i accepted

**space dad (15:11)**

Of course you did

Sorry though, I dont think I can make it

**2007 emo kid (15:12)**

aww

who else am i gonna go with

you're the only one who can stand my obnoxious cheering

**space dad (15:12)**

Sorry keith

Maybe ask lance?

He's a panic! fan too

**2007 emo kid (15:13)**

but shiroooo

:((

**space dad (15:14)**

Whats the problem?

Its a win win situation

**2007 emo kid (15:14)**

i don't think lance would want to go with me

**space dad (15:14)**

Why not?

**2007 emo kid (15:15)**

i dunno

i feel like he doesn't really like me

**space dad (15:15)**

Seriously?

He basically likes everyone

You'd have to be some kind of heartless dog killer for him to dislike you

**2007 emo kid (15:16)**

i know

but sometimes i feel like he ignores me?

he's fine in group situations

but he doesn't seem comfortable talking to me one on one

**space dad (15:16)**

Maybe thats because of a different reason?

**2007 emo kid (15:17)**

but i dont get what other reason there could be

and i dont want ask him and make him feel obliged to go with me

**space dad (15:17)**

Hmm

You could ask in the group chat?

So that way the question will be directed at everyone

And if lance doesn't want to go then he won't feel awkward

**2007 emo kid (15:19)**

thats

actually not a bad idea

wow

talking to you has actually been helpful for once

**space dad (15:19)**

Is that supposed to be an insult?

**2007 emo kid (15:20)**

thanks shiro

**space dad (15:20)**

Keith

KEITH

HOW DARE YOU

COME BACK HERE 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> disclaimer: i have no idea what college is actually like so if i get anything wrong its google's fault


	2. lance has messed up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _**sharpshooter has created the group "lance has messed up"** _
> 
> _(kiss the cook, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter)_
> 
> **sharpshooter (19:45)**  
>     
> guys
> 
> **rest in peace rover (19:45)**
> 
> _[captainamerica.jpg]_
> 
> _caption attached: so, you agreed to go to a concert with the guy that you've been crushing on and trying to get over_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you all for the support on the last chapter! im glad a lot of you liked the b99 references as much as me lol

_**september 19th, 2018** _

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**2007 emo kid (15:21)**

are any of you free this friday?

theres a p!atd concert on that day and i have 2 tickets so i was wondering if anyone wanted to go with me

**rest in peace rover (15:22)**

did you just say p!atd?

as in

panic! at the disco?

**2007 emo kid (15:22)**

uh yeah?

**rest in peace rover (15:22)**

oh boy

**2007 emo kid (15:23)**

why

**sharpshooter (15:23)**

DID SOMEONE SAY PANIC AT THE DISCO

**rest in peace rover (15:23)**

im muting the chat

**sharpshooter (15:24)**

IVE BEEN SUMMONED

**rest in peace rover (15:24)**

call me when he's done

**sharpshooter (15:24)**

KEITH KOGANE

ARE YOU SAYING

THAT YOU HAVE TICKETS

FOR PANIC AT THE FUCKING DISCO

**2007 emo kid (15:25)**

i am genuinely scared to answer that question

**sharpshooter (15:25)**

WELL

SINCE YOU OFFERED

AND SINCE NOBODY ELSE IS WILLING TO GO

**power of god & anime (15:25)**

actually

**sharpshooter (15:26)**

MATT

**power of god & anime (15:26)**

id be willing 2 go too

**sharpshooter (15:26)**

MATT NO

PLEASE DONT RUIN MY DREAMS

IM BEGGING YOU

**2007 emo kid (15:26)**

lance

**sharpshooter (15:27)**

MY LIFE LONG DREAM HAS BEEN TO SEE BRENDON URIE IN REAL LIFE

**2007 emo kid (15:27)**

LANCE

**sharpshooter (15:27)**

IN ALL HIS GLORY

**power of god & anime (15:27)**

im p sure thats everyones dream

**2007 emo kid (15:27)**

_LANCE_

if i give you the ticket will you shut up

**sharpshooter (15:28)**

YES

**2007 emo kid (15:28)**

its yours

**sharpshooter (15:28)**

and that

my friends

is how to get what you want

**2007 emo kid (15:29)**

i have made a mistake

**power of god & anime (15:29)**

yeah, you have

* * *

_**sharpshooter has created the group "lance has messed up"** _

_(kiss the cook, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter)_

**sharpshooter (19:45)**

guys

**rest in peace rover (19:45)**

[[captainamerica.jpg] ](https://i.kym-cdn.com/entries/icons/mobile/000/026/202/america.jpg)

_caption attached: so, you agreed to go to a concert with the guy that you've been crushing on and trying to get over_  

**sharpshooter (19:46)**

ahshdjdjfbf

i knOW

fuck

i was just too carried away at the thought of seeing panic! live

**kiss the cook (19:48)**

Well, good luck buddy

**sharpshooter (19:48)**

no wait

i need your help pleaseee

**princess™ (19:49)**

i mean theres nothing we can really do

**rest in peace rover (19:49)**

yeah

its not like you could just suddenly seem uninterested

**sharpshooter (19:49)**

i dont think i seemed _that_  eager

it would be belivable

right

**princess™ (19:50)**

lance,,,

**sharpshooter (19:50)**

see this is where you're supposed to say yes

**rest in peace rover (19:51)**

see this is where you come to terms with the fact that you're going to have to spend 3 full hours with keith kogane alone with no one else to act as a buffer

**sharpshooter (19:52)**

,,, no i dont think thats how it goes

**kiss the cook (19:52)**

Oh boy

How long do you think he'll take to recover

**princess™ (19:53)**

hunk

you have too much faith

he never will

* * *

_**september 22nd, 2018** _

_**2007 emo kid + sharpshooter** _

**sharpshooter (17:23)**

im waiting outside your apartment

**2007 emo kid (17:25)**

stalker

**sharpshooter (17:25)**

are you done?

**2007 emo kid (17:25)**

almost

**sharpshooter (17:26)**

cmon kogane we dont have much time left

its a half hour drive

and the concert starts at 6

**2007 emo kid (17:29)**

yeah yeah stop nagging me and i'll come out quicker

**sharpshooter (17:30)**

better keep your promise

* * *

**_lance has messed up_ **

_(kiss the cook, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter)_

**sharpshooter (17:38)**

please explain to me how someone can look this hot in a fucking band tee

**princess™ (17:40)**

i assume you've just picked up keith from his apartment?

**sharpshooter (17:41)**

yes

and i have also just realised the mistake ive made

**rest in peace rover (17:41)**

this is gonna be a fun night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im excited for the next chapter because adam finally makes an appearance
> 
> and because vld basically gave him 2 seconds of screen time in season 7, im just gonna use my own headcanons for him


	3. salt n vinegar loving prick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **sharpshooter (20:11)**
> 
> you'd better get your ass back here quick
> 
> dying in la is about to start and im definitely gonna cry
> 
> so ive made it my life mission to bring you down with me
> 
> **2007 emo kid (20:12)**
> 
> no please
> 
> i've already faced your obnoxious cheering
> 
> im not emotionally ready to handle your crying
> 
> also im a sucker for that song
> 
> **sharpshooter (20:12)**
> 
> too late
> 
> already on my way

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i honestly don't know how long this fic is going to be but i hope to stretch it out for as long as i can because im a sucker for these losers

_**space rangers** _

_**(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)** _

**2007 emo kid (20:05)**

what the fuck guys

how is lance's cheering somehow _more_ obnoxious than mine

**other space dad (20:06)**

god given talent

that's how

i once made the mistake of going to a concert with him

never again

**2007 emo kid (20:06)**

and you didnt give me a warning??

some future brother in law you are

**other space dad (20:06)**

oops

**sharpshooter (20:10)**

hello

security

have you seen my son

he's about this tall clearly gay but we haven't had the talk yet

**2007 emo kid (20:11)**

ha ha

very funny

**sharpshooter (20:11)**

thank you

ive often been praised for my exceptional sense of humour

anyways

you'd better get your ass back here quick

dying in la is about to start and im definitely gonna cry

so ive made it my life mission to bring you down with me

**2007 emo kid (20:12)**

no please

i've already faced your obnoxious cheering

im not emotionally ready to handle your crying

also im a sucker for that song

**sharpshooter (20:12)**

too late

already on my way

im gonna drag you out from that toilet stall even if its the last thing i do

**2007 emo kid (20:13)**

NO

ADAM HELP ME

**other space dad (20:13)**

go cry your hearts out, kids

* * *

_**our flat's a mess and so are we** _

_**(2007 emo kid, other space dad, space dad)** _

**space dad (22:03)**

Keith

Are you on the way home?

**2007 emo kid (22:12)**

yeah

but lance had to stop for fuel so we might be a bit late

**other space dad (22:12)**

how was the concert?

**2007 emo kid (22:13)**

it was really fun

i'd definitely do it again

lance cried thrice

**space dad (22:13)**

Thrice?

**2007 emo kid (22:13)**

yeah

once when he saw brendon walk onto stage

once during dying in la

and once after the whole concert was over because he was sad that we had to leave

**other space dad (22:14)**

damn

can't say im surprised tho

i went grocery shopping with him once and he cried because the store was out of bbq chips

**2007 emo kid (22:16)**

anD MY SORRWO WAS JUSTIFIED

u wouldtn undertand bc u hav bad taste

salt n vingear loving prick

**2007 emo kid (22:17)**

sorry

that was lance

he stole my phone

**space dad (22:17)**

Tell him to keep his eyes on the road

**2007 emo kid (22:18)**

he just flipped me the bird

i think it was meant for you

**other space dad (22:18)**

tell him to respect his elders

**2007 emo kid (22:18)**

he said

and i quote

"i'll respect you at your funeral, grandpa"

**other space dad (22:18)**

goddamn

the audacity of youth these days

* * *

_**september 24th, 2018** _

_**kiss the cook + sharpshooter** _

**kiss the cook (16:37)**

Why aren't you back yet

Didn't your end class @ 2pm?

**sharpshooter (16:40)**

i went to adams house

he's helping me with my english paper

**kiss the cook (16:40)**

Oh

Hows that working out for you?

**sharpshooter (16:40)**

horribly

as usual

and i keep getting distracted

**kiss the cook (16:40)**

Why

**sharpshooter (16:41)**

because keiths here

**kiss the cook (16:41)**

Should've seen that coming

**sharpshooter (16:41)**

but like

hes not even doing anything out of the ordinary

hes just talking and laughing with shiro

and he has messy bed hair

is there some part of my brain that finds this hot?

**kiss the cook (16:41)**

Are you sure you're distracted _just_  because you find him _hot?_

**sharpshooter (16:42)**

idk my brain isnt functioning today

shit gotta go

adams coming back

see u later

<3

**kiss the cook (16:42)**

Have fun gawking at keith :))

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hunk knows™
> 
> this chapter is really short but buckle up folks, the next few ones are pretty long


	4. spaghetti and meatballs

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **other space dad (09:08)**  
>     
> please dont tell me you and lance actually fought
> 
> i dont have enough money to bail you out of jail
> 
> **sharpshooter (09:09)**
> 
> of course not
> 
> **2007 emo kid (09:09)**
> 
> we settled our grudges like mature adults
> 
> **kiss the cook (09:09)**
> 
> keith came over and they played uno

_**september 25th, 2018** _

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**rest in peace rover (21:50)**

do u losers have anything going on tomorrow night?

**2007 emo kid (21:50)**

why?

do you need a hitman?

because i know a guy

if you're interested

**space dad (21:50)**

KEITH

**2007 emo kid (21:51)**

what?

im just offering

**space dad (21:51)**

There will be no murder allowed

**2007 emo kid (21:51)**

you're no fun

**rest in peace rover (21:52)**

anyways

the reason i asked is because we haven't had a movie night in a long time

and i was wondering if you guys wanted to have one

**2007 emo kid (21:52)**

YES

YES

YES

OH MY GOD

THIS IS PERFECT

THERES THIS DOCUMENTARY ON NETFLIX

**sharpshooter (21:52)**

keith

**2007 emo kid (21:52)**

AND I WATCHED THE FIRST HALF AND IT SEEMED RLY INTERESTING

**sharpshooter (21:53)**

i swear to fucking god if this is another alien documentary

**2007 emo kid (21:53)**

SHUTUP LANCE THIS IS A GOOD ONE

**sharpshooter (21:53)**

THATS WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT THE LAST 4

**2007 emo kid (21:54)**

WELL ITS BETTER THAN WATCHING MAMMA MIA FOR THE SEVENTH TIME IN A ROW

**sharpshooter (21:54)**

you take thAT BACK

**rest in peace rover (21:54)**

im with keith on this one

**sharpshooter (21:54)**

THATS NOT FAIR

YOU'RE A SUCKER FOR ALIEN DOCUMENTARIES TOO

**rest in peace rover (21:55)**

your point?

**sharpshooter (21:55)**

MY POINT IS

WE NEED SOMEONE WHOS UNBIASED TO DECIDE

**power of god & anime (21:57)**

your savior is here

**sharpshooter (21:57)**

MATT

MY BELOVED MATTHEW

**rest in peace rover (21:57)**

ew

**sharpshooter (21:57)**

shut up pidgeon

let matt, an intellectual, decide whether we should watch mamma mia (aka the film that is clearly superior) or whatever dumbass alien documentary you guys are rooting for

**power of god & anime (21:58)**

hm

well as much as i love mamma mia

**sharpshooter (21:58)**

dont you fucking say it

**power of god & anime (21:58)**

maybe its time for a change?

**sharpshooter (21:58)**

you are officially blocked

im disowning all of you

except hunk

hunk can stay

**kiss the cook (21:59)**

I heard my name

Aww lance

Love you

**sharpshooter (21:59)**

love u too buddy

**2007 emo kid (21:59)**

cmon lance

just give it a chance

you might be surprised

**sharpshooter (22:00)**

ive already given it 4 chances

nothing you say will change the fact that aliens are boring and space is dumb

**rest in peace rover (22:00)**

lance you are an astronomy major

**sharpshooter (22:01)**

still

i refuse to be associated with these crappy alien documentaries

**princess™ (22:05)**

oh you wanna talk about crappy documentaries now?

when you were 9 you were obsessed

and i mean fucking  _obsessed_

with loch ness monster documentaries

**sharpshooter (22:06)**

ALLURA

**rest in peace rover (22:06)**

oh my GOD

**sharpshooter (22:06)**

WHAT THE FUCJ

YOU SWORE NOT TO TELL

**princess™ (22:06)**

sorry lance

just speaking the truth

**2007 emo kid (22:07)**

are you for real

all this time

you've been mocking my taste

**sharpshooter (22:07)**

because your taste is garbage

**2007 emo kid (22:07)**

i know

but that doesn't matter now because your taste is equally as garbage too

**sharpshooter (22:07)**

THATS NOT TRUE

**2007 emo kid (22:08)**

fight me™

**sharpshooter (22:08)**

meet me in the parking lot at 2am

**rest in peace rover (22:10)**

*chanting* FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT

* * *

_**september 26th, 2018** _

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**other space dad (09:08)**

what the actual f u c k

**2007 emo kid (09:08)**

well hello to you too, my dear future brother in law

**other space dad (09:08)**

please dont tell me you and lance actually fought

i dont have enough money to bail you out of jail

**sharpshooter (09:09)**

of course not

**2007 emo kid (09:09)**

we settled our grudges like mature adults

**kiss the cook (09:09)**

keith came over and they played uno

**sharpshooter (09:10)**

and i won

**2007 emo kid (09:10)**

only because you cheated

you didn't say uno

**sharpshooter (09:10)**

stop slandering my name

i clearly remember saying it

you just didn't hear it because of all the gunk in your ear

**2007 emo kid (09:10)**

gasp

dadam!!

he's making fun of my auditory processing issues again

**sharpshooter (09:11)**

dadam?

**2007 emo kid (09:11)**

dad + adam = dadam

trust me, it'll catch on soon

**other space dad (09:12)**

no it wont

will you guys please stop bickering for 10 minutes so that we can discuss the movie night

**sharpshooter (09:12)**

fine

but im setting a timer

**other space dad (09:12)**

thank you

so pidge

you wanna have the movie night at our place like usual?

**rest in peace rover (09:14)**

hell yes

your couch is so comfy

i wanna marry it

**other space dad (09:14)**

you're gonna have to pry it from my cold dead hands first

all of you okay with 6pm today?

**sharpshooter (09:14)**

cool w me

**2007 emo kid (09:14)**

i never have any plans ever

so yeah

**power of god & anime (09:17)**

i had plans for world domination but i guess they'll have to be postponed

**kiss the cook (09:23)**

I'll bring snacks

**sharpshooter (09:24)**

i'll bring my good looks and charm

**princess™ (09:24)**

how are you gonna bring something you don't have

**sharpshooter (09:24)**

rude™

**princess™ (09:24)**

i'll bring the blankets

**rest in peace rover (09:24)**

aw yeah

we're gonna make the coolest fucking blanket fort

**space dad (09:30)**

I don't really have a choice, do I?

**other space dad (09:32)**

nope :)

**power of god & anime (09:32)**

imma bring my moms spaghetti and meatballs

**kiss the cook (09:33)**

Will you also bring the kindness in your heart and finally give me the recipe for the aforementioned spaghetti and meatballs?

**power of god & anime (09:33)**

sorry man

just like the other 56 times you've asked me, the answer is no

**kiss the cook (09:33)**

That recipe will be mine one day

**power of god & anime (09:34)**

say whatever you gotta say to make yourself feel better

* * *

_**adashi fan club** _

_(_ _other_ _space dad, power of god & anime, space dad)_

**power of god & anime (17:56)**

knock knock

**other space dad (17:58)**

whos there

**power of god & anime (17:58)**

your favourite child

**other space dad (17:59)**

id prefer pidge over you

**power of god & anime (17:59)**

ouch

can you pls come n open the door

**other space dad (17:59)**

dont you have a spare key?

**power of god & anime (18:00)**

couldnt find it

**other space dad (18:00)**

are you kidding me

if someone breaks into our house i'll know who to sue

**power of god & anime (18:00)**

im soRRY

but pls come asap people in the hallway are looking at me weird

maybe its the giant tub of spaghetti and meatballs im currently holding

**other space dad (18:01)**

suffer

**space dad (18:01)**

Okay fine im coming

**power of god & anime (18:01)**

see this is why shiro is my favourite

* * *

_**rest in peace rover + sharpshooter** _

**rest in peace rover (17:46)**

i stole matt's spare key to shiro's apartment

meet me there in 10

we're gonna sneak in and scare the living hell out of everyone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> everyone trying to plan something and getting way off track is 100% me and my friends


	5. klance.jpg

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **power of god & anime**
> 
> _[ew.jpg]_
> 
> get a room
> 
> there are children here
> 
> and literally no one wants to see both of you shoving your tongues down each others throats
> 
> **other space dad (18:33)**
> 
> the only child around here is shiro
> 
> and _he's_ the one shoving his tongue down my throat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this fic is a mess and so am i, but what else is new?

_**space rangers** _

_**(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)** _

**sharpshooter (18:05)**

_[surprisemotherfucker.mp4]_

_playing video..._

 

_"She's coming_ _—"_

_"Lance, shut up!"_

 

_"Allura!"_

_"What do you want, Shiro?"_

_"Could you help me get my phone charger? I think I left it on the couch."_

_"Go get it yourself."_

_"Allura, i am an elderly man—"_

_"You're like six years old!"_

_"Well, this six year old needs help getting his phone charger because he doesn't want to leave the warm embrace of his lover."_

_"Gross. I'll get you your charger if you promise never to utter that sentence ever again."_

_"Thanks!"_

_"Yeah, yeah. You're welco— WHAT THE FUCK PIDGE?"_

  
**rest in peace rover (18:06)**

I CANT BELIEVE IT ACTUALLY WORKED

OH MY GOD GUYS YOU SHOULDVE SEEN THE LOOK ON HER FACE WHEN WE TACKLED HER

**princess™ (18:06)**

well fuck you guys too

fucking demons

lance, this isnt over

**sharpshooter (18:07)**

pidge was involved too!!

**princess™ (18:07)**

yeah but i know better than to fuck with pidge

**rest in peace rover (18:07)**

wise choice

* * *

_**adashi fan club** _

_**(other space dad, power of god & anime, space dad)** _

**power of god & anime (18:29)**

_[ew.jpg]_

get a room

there are children here

and literally no one wants to see both of you shoving your tongues down each others throats

**other space dad (18:33)**

the only child around here is shiro

and _he's_ the one shoving his tongue down my throat

**space dad (18:33)**

ADAM

There was no tongue shoving involved

We're classier than that

**other space dad (18:33)**

are we tho?

**space dad (18:34)**

Babe, shut up

**other space dad (18:34)**

why dont you come back here and make me

**power of god & anime (18:34)**

nope nope nope nope im out

have fun suffocating each other

* * *

**_princess™ + sharpshooter_ **

**princess™ (19:12)**

is that your attempt at being subtle?

**sharpshooter (19:15)**

i have no idea what youre talking about

**princess™ (19:15)**

im talking about you staring at keith from afar like he contains the secrets of the universe

**sharpshooter (19:15)**

what

im not staring

**sharpshooter (19:16)**

OUCH

allura did you really have to walk all the way over to the kitchen just to kick me

**princess™ (19:16)**

you had it coming

* * *

**_adashi fan club_ **

**_(other space dad, power of god & anime, space dad)_ **

**space dad (19:43)**

_[gross.jpg]_

_caption attached: Here, we have a wild matt holt. He seems to be performing a mating ritual of sorts._

**power of god & anime (19:45)**

AHSHDHS

SHIRO

**other space dad (19:46)**

im making that my profile pic

**power of god & anime (19:46)**

NO

**other space dad (19:46)**

you cant stop medkfkrcpfsjdkf

**space dad (19:47)**

Matt

Give my boyfriend his phone back

**power of god & anime (19:47)**

not until i delete that photo of me picking my nose

* * *

_**september 27th, 2018** _

**_2007 emo kid + sharpshooter_ **

**2007 emo kid (00:53)**

so how was the documentary?

**sharpshooter (00:53)**

god

i hate to say it

and i mean _really_ hate to say it

but

it was pretty decent

**2007 emo kid (00:53)**

i'll take that as a win

**sharpshooter (0:54)**

you got lucky this time

i guarantee that the quality of the next one will plunge right back to shit

**2007 emo kid (00:54)**

are you saying that theres going to be a next time?

**sharpshooter (00:54)**

no

keith

no

shit how do you delete a message

**2007 emo kid (00:54)**

i have screenshots

**sharpshooter (00:54)**

dammit

**sharpshooter (00:55)**

hold on 

why are we texting

we are literally sitting on the same couch

**2007 emo kid (00:55)**

because actual human interaction is overrated

plus, pidge is sleeping on my shoulder and i really dont wanna wake her up

its a miracle that gremlin is sleeping for once

**sharpshooter (00:55)**

oh yeah

hunks is basically using my arm as his personal pillow and its rly uncomfortable but if i move i might wake him

**2007 emo kid (00:56)**

i really missed hanging out with everyone

we should do this more often

**sharpshooter (00:56)**

aw

thats sweet

**2007 emo keith (00:56)**

i know

shocking

keith kogane actually does have a heart

**sharpshooter (00:57)**

i mean

not really a surprise to me

ive known since i saw u cry at the concert last friday

**2007 emo kid (00:57)**

those weren't tears

my eyes were merely sweating

**sharpshooter (00:57)**

whatever u say

**2007 emo kid (00:58)**

did u have fun?

at the concert i mean

**sharpshooter (00:58)**

i was literally screaming the whole time

yes i enjoyed it

**2007 emo kid (00:58)**

but like

it was with me

**sharpshooter (00:58)**

yeah?

you're the one who made it fun

**2007 emo kid (00:59)**

oh

sorry lol its late and im rambling

**sharpshooter (00:59)**

no its okay

you thought that i wouldn't enjoy the concert because you were there?

**2007 emo kid (01:00)**

kinda

**sharpshooter (01:00)**

why?

**2007 emo kid (01:01)**

i dont know

its probably just me overanalyzing everything

because we only seem to hang out when pidge hunk or allura are around too

never really one to one

you know?

so i thought

you didnt really like spending time with me

**sharpshooter (01:02)**

oh

im sorry

**2007 emo kid (01:02)**

no its okay

wasn't your fault

**sharpshooter (01:02)**

but still

im really sorry

for making you feel ignored

or like 

unwanted 

that concert was one of the best experiences ive had

i really enjoy spending time with you

**2007 emo kid (01:03)**

since when did you get so sappy?

**sharpshooter (01:03)**

it is a known fact that i become the sappiest of saps when sleep deprived

**2007 emo kid (01:03)**

we should go to sleep then

**sharpshooter (01:04)**

aw dont u wanna listen to more of my ramblings?

**2007 emo kid (01:04)**

maybe next time

goodnight sharpshooter

**sharpshooter (01:04)**

night night emo child

**2007 emo kid (01:05)**

and lance?

i really like hanging out with you too

* * *

_**lance has messed up** _

_**(kiss the cook, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter)** _

**kiss the cook (08:21)**

_[klance.jpg]_

I can't believe this

I wake up and whats the first thing i see? Lance and keith on the couch snuggling each other in their sleep

**rest in peace rover (08:25)**

oh my god

keith is fucking cradling the poor boys arm

and lance has his head resting on top of keiths

they're disgustingly cute

**princess™ (08:26)**

clink clink bitch i call dibs on the first toast at their wedding


	6. thank you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **princess™ (01:45)**
> 
> lance kogane
> 
> and keith mcclain
> 
> you better turn down that music before i personally come over and push both of you off a cliff
> 
> **2007 emo kid (01:48)**
> 
> you can pry our emo music away from our cold dead bodies
> 
> **princess™ (01:48)**
> 
> i wont hesitate bitch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i started listening to all time low while writing this fic — i'm actually listening to them right now as i format this — so i really wanted to include them somehow

_**october 2nd, 2018** _

_**2007 emo kid + sharpshooter** _

**2007 emo kid (00:32)**

if i dropped out of college

how hard do you think shiro would kick my ass

this is a hypothetical question by the way

**sharpshooter (00:33)**

keith

buddy

first of all

what the actual fuck

second of all

he'd kick your ass to pluto and back

**2007 emo kid (00:33)**

thanks for the imput

**sharpshooter (00:33)**

whats wrong

**2007 emo kid (00:34)**

i have a geometry test tomorrow

and i may or may not have procrastinated studying

**sharpshooter (00:34)**

time and time again you manage to amaze me with your incredible decision making skills

**2007 emo kid (00:34)**

ive also ran out of caffeine

and shiro refuses to let me raid his redbull stash

"keith, im a fucking college professor" he says

"i need it more than you do"

**sharpshooter (00:36)**

wanna come over?

i can help

or at least try to

**2007 emo kid (00:36)**

do you have coffee?

**sharpshooter (00:36)**

i think theres some in the kitchen

**2007 emo kid (00:37)**

already on my way

* * *

**_space rangers_ **

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**princess™ (01:45)**

lance kogane

and keith mcclain

you better turn down that music before i personally come over and push both of you off a cliff

**2007 emo kid (01:48)**

you can pry our emo music away from our cold dead bodies

**princess™ (01:48)**

i wont hesitate bitch

**kiss the cook (01:50)**

How did you guys manage to go from studying to blasting MCR

**sharpshooter (01:50)**

well

keith casually mentioned that he had never listened to a single all time low song

(and he claims to be a true emo)

so of course, i had to enlighten his poor soul

**2007 emo kid (01:50)**

then we kinda got into a competition of who could play the most emo song

**kiss the cook (01:50)**

Thats not the best idea, considering the fact that its currently 1am and we have neighbours

**sharpshooter (01:51)**

since when have i ever been known for having good ideas

**princess™ (01:56)**

me and romelle are trying to fucking s t u d y

im giving you one last chance to turn down the music before i come down there and murder you myself

**sharpshooter (01:56)**

only the weak surrender

**2007 emo kid (01:56)**

we shall go down with glory

**kiss the cook (02:01)**

OH JESUS NO

ALLURAS ACTUALLY HERE

SHES HAVING A TICKLE WAR WITH THEM

I NEED TO GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE BEFORE THEY DRAG ME IN

* * *

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**2007 emo kid (10:06)**

im officially removing lance from my will

**power of god & anime (10:07)**

well its about time

**2007 emo kid (10:07)**

i fell asleep at his apartment yesterday

and he woke me up by blasting wake me up by evanescence in my ear

**sharpshooter (10:07)**

and were u late for class?

no?

youre welcome

i expect a handwritten thank you letter on my desk by 5 tdy

**2007 emo kid (10:08)**

in your dreams

i am strongly considering removing hunk as well

because he was the one that had the idea in the first place

**power of god & anime (10:08)**

hold on

does that mean lance and hunk were already on ur will to begin with?

**2007 emo kid (10:08)**

no

matt

thats not what i meant

**power of god anime (10:08)**

busted™

**sharpshooter (10:09)**

im honored

**2007 emo kid (10:09)**

fuck off, both of you 

* * *

_**lance has messed up** _

_(kiss the cook, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter)_

**sharpshooter (16:17)**

im gonna physically combust

_[thankyounote.jpg]_

_loading image..._

 

_lance_

_thanks for helping me with_  
_geometry last night_

_ignore the fact that this is_  
_written on a mcdonalds receipt_

_its the thought that counts_

_(you've still been removed from my will)_

_keith_

 

**kiss the cook (16:22)**

You are so far gone for that boy 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> feedback is appreciated!


	7. coffee shop au

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **sharpshooter (12:05)**
> 
> did anyone order a generous serving of hunks love life?
> 
> **princess™ (12:06)**
> 
> I HEARD HUNK AND LOVE LIFE MENTIONED IN THE SAME SENTENCE AND I AM HERE FOR IT
> 
> **sharpshooter (12:06)**
> 
> okay so there's this new barista that started working at the same cafe as hunk
> 
> **power of god & anime (12:06)**
> 
> oh hell YES this already sounds like an coffee shop au fic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> first off, i wanted to say thank you so much for 100 kudos! yall really motivate me to keep writing these chapters

_**october 6th, 2018** _

_**kiss the cook + sharpshooter** _

**sharpshooter (11:15)**

hunk

you aint subtle

at all

**sharpshooter (11:21)**

there are like 7 other people in this cafe rn and all of them are painfully aware of you making googly eyes at the new barista

cant blame you tho

shes rly cute

seems like your type

**sharpshooter (11:28)**

i dont know if your goal is to be super obvious

but if it is

then congrats

youve succeeded

**sharpshooter (11:36)**

even pidge, an actual 5 yr old, can tell that your poor soul is head over heels for her

ouch that little gremlin just kicked me in the shin

fuck you too pidge

wait no i meant to say that last text out loud

my brain isnt working this coffee is faulty i demand a refund

**sharpshooter (11:41)**

answer your phone dammit

**sharpshooter (11:43)**

nvm i forgot you have a rule about not checking your phone while you're working

which btw is a dumb rule

what if theres an emergency

like what if i accidently chip my nails again and need you to come back asap and bake me your signature choco chip cookies to make me feel better

**sharpshooter (12:05)**

IS SHE GIVING YOU HER NUMBER

this is like a coffee shop au come to life

hold on hold on i need to give the space rangers gc a live update asap

* * *

  _ **space rangers**_

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**sharpshooter (12:05)**

did anyone order a generous serving of hunks love life?

**princess™ (12:06)**

I HEARD HUNK AND LOVE LIFE MENTIONED IN THE SAME SENTENCE AND I AM HERE FOR IT

**sharpshooter (12:06)**

okay so there's this new barista that started working at the same cafe as hunk

**power of god & anime (12:06)**

oh hell YES this already sounds like an coffee shop au fic

**sharpshooter (12:07)**

thats exactly what i was thinking!

so anyways

hunk is HEAD OVER HEELS for this girl

like you know the face he makes when he sees mama holt's spaghetti and meatballs

its THAT face

**power of god & anime (12:07)**

no way

i dont believe you

thats not physically possible

**sharpshooter (12:07)**

one of these days i will capture photographic evidence

shes also really sweet from what i can tell

she even passed the pidge test

**princess™ (12:08)**

oh,, my god,,,

she passed the pidge test?

**rest in peace rover (12:08)**

yeah she somehow managed to win over my cold dead heart

**princess™ (12:08)**

hunk, marry her

**sharpshooter (12:08)**

he will soon considering how things are currently going

she just gave him her number

**power of god & anime (12:09)**

here lies matt holt (1994 - 2018)

cause of death: hunks love life

may he rip in peace

**rest in peace rover (12:09)**

hey idiot you're not allowed to die before i do remember 

**kiss the cook (12:10)**

Are you serious

I come to the back for like a ten minute break

Take one look at my messages

And see this

**sharpshooter (12:10)**

dont try to change the topic

give us details

**kiss the cook (12:11)**

I will  _not_  spend the whole of my 5 min break giving you details about shay

**sharpshooter (12:11)**

HER NAME IS SHAY

**princess™ (12:11)**

im already thinking of ship names

**kiss the cook (12:11)**

You guys are so embarrassing

Pidge back me up here

**rest in peace rover (12:12)**

hunay sounds nice

**princess™ (12:12)**

HUNAY YES

**kiss the cook (12:12)**

This is betrayal at its finest

**sharpshooter (12:12)**

i hear wedding bells already

**kiss the cook (12:12)**

We literally just met

**sharpshooter (12:13)**

AND exchanged numbers

**kiss the cook (12:13)**

That was just in case I needed to cover her shift in the future 

**princess™ (12:13)**

are you sure it was the _only_ reason? ;)

**kiss the cook (12:13)**

I hate all of you

I'm muting this chat and going back outside

**princess™ (12:14)**

make us proud!

**rest in peace rover (12:14)**

we've trained him well

now hes off on his own

spreading his wings

finding love

**sharpshooter (12:14)**

*sheds tear* they grow up so fast

**power of god & anime (12:15)**

GO GET EM HUNK

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the first draft of this chapter was a bitch to complete, so i said fuck it, scrapped the draft, came up with a new idea and proceeded to write the whole thing within a day. turns out i have a lot of motivation to write coffee shop aus


	8. arcades and ice cream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **princess™ (14:37)**
> 
> i'll only agree to go if we get baskin robbins afterwards
> 
> **sharpshooter (14:37)**
> 
> deal
> 
> now haul your ass downstairs
> 
> keith hunk and i squeezed in the backseat just so u could have shotgun
> 
> **princess™ (14:38)**
> 
> does that mean pidge is driving?
> 
> damn didn't think id have to plan my funeral this early

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter took longer than i expected but its finally here!

_**october 11th, 2018** _

_**princess™ + sharpshooter** _

**sharpshooter (14:33)**

get in loser

we're going shopping

**princess™ (14:34)**

lance its 2018

why do u still insist on unironically referencing mean girls

**sharpshooter (14:34)**

because that movie is timeless

**princess™ (14:34)**

it really isn't

**sharpshooter (14:34)**

okay shh we're getting off topic

look out your window

**princess™ (14:35)**

lance

what the fuck

why is matts car outside

**sharpshooter (14:35)**

surprise!1!1

the gangs all here

**princess™ (14:35)**

what did you do

**sharpshooter (14:35)**

i think you know

**princess™ (14:36)**

is this because of what day it is

i told you

im fine

**sharpshooter (14:36)**

allura ive known you for nearly half your life

you cant fool me

**princess™ (14:36)**

do i even have an option at this point

**sharpshooter (14:36)**

nope

**princess™ (14:37)**

can i at least know where we're going

**sharpshooter (14:37)**

the arcade near roseford beach

**princess™ (14:37)**

i'll only agree to go if we get baskin robbins afterwards

**sharpshooter (14:37)**

deal

now haul your ass downstairs

keith hunk and i squeezed in the backseat just so u could have shotgun

**princess™ (14:38)**

does that mean pidge is driving?

damn didn't think id have to plan my funeral this early

* * *

_**2007 emo kid + rest in peace rover** _

**2007 emo kid (15:13)**

how the ever loving fuck did you manage to get separated from us so soon

**rest in peace rover (15:15)**

for once, it wasnt my fault

hunk practically yanked me over to the whack a mole machines

where did you go?

**2007 emo kid (15:15)**

got pulled over to the ddr machines

**rest in peace rover (15:16)**

ah of course

once again, lance is overly predictable

**2007 emo kid (15:16)**

actually it was alluras idea

she dragged both of us along

**rest in peace rover (15:16)**

really?

didnt peg allura as a dancer

**2007 emo kid (15:16)**

me neither

but shes really good

maybe even better than lance

**rest in peace rover (15:17)**

no fucking way

lance is undefeated

**2007 emo kid (15:17)**

that title might not last much longer

they're competing right now and alluras in the lead

**rest in peace rover (15:17)**

i dont believe you

**2007 emo kid (15:17)**

wanna bet?

**rest in peace rover (15:18)**

loser has to buy ice cream for the winner

**2007 emo kid (15:18)**

you're on

* * *

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**princess™ (15:24)**

_[ddrchampion.jpg]_

mcclain has been defeated

i am your new champion

bow down to me

**2007 emo kid (15:24)**

fyi pidge my favourite flavour is strawberry

**rest in peace rover (15:25)**

dammit lance i was rooting for you

you just had to go and get your ass kicked by allura

**sharpshooter (15:25)**

okay i wouldnt say she kicked my ass

**2007 emo kid (15:25)**

no i'm pretty sure she did

**sharpshooter (15:25)**

those are bold words coming from you

i bet i could kick _your_  ass

**2007 emo kid (15:26)**

is that a challenge?

**sharpshooter (15:26)**

is that an acceptance?

**princess™ (15:27)**

aaand now they're competing against each other at ddr

how did i not see this coming

i love competitive boyfriends

**princess™ (15:28)**

oh damn keith has NO rhythm at all

sksjdjhdh this is horrendous to watch

**rest in peace rover (15:28)**

come join me and hunk over at the whack a mole machines

**princess™ (15:28)**

already on my way

* * *

_**kiss the cook + sharpshooter** _

**kiss the cook (16:19)**

So how'd it go

Did you kick his ass like you said you would?

**sharpshooter (16:21)**

hell yeah i did

and i didnt even have to try

that boy could not dance to save his life

he got his revenge afterwards tho

completely wiped the floor with me at the racing games

**kiss the cook (16:22)**

You're pretty decent at those games though?

**sharpshooter (16:22)**

yeah but hes fucking amazing

like ridiculously so

and also i may have been slightly distracted by how hot he looked riding a motorbike

**kiss the cook (16:22)**

Not surprising

**sharpshooter (16:26)**

how many tickets do u guys have?

**kiss the cook (16:26)**

250-ish

Most of them were from pidge

She spent a lot of time at the pac man machines

**sharpshooter (16:26)**

aw man

keith and i only have like 200 in total

i wanted to get something that cost 500 tickets

and i was hoping we'd have enough if we combined

**kiss the cook (16:26)**

We still have some tokens

And theres this cool basketball shooting machine that allura and I really wanna try

**sharpshooter (16:27)**

the one in the back?

**kiss the cook (16:27)**

Yeah

You guys should come help

More people = more tickets

We might be able to get enough

**sharpshooter (16:27)**

give us a sec

we'll be right over

* * *

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**princess™ (17:08)**

_[actual_princess.jpg]_

_caption attached: v happy gal_

**power of god & anime (17:08)**

baskin robins in one hand

blue lion plushie in the other

ms altea is truly living life to the fullest

**other space dad (17:10)**

im so jealous of that lion plushie

**rest in peace rover (17:10)**

for just 500 tickets, it could be yours!

**other space dad (17:10)**

sigh

if only _someone_  wasn't so bad at arcade games

*side eyes shiro*

* * *

_**princess™ + sharpshooter** _

**princess™ (18:13)**

you let me win

**sharpshooter (18:13)**

what are u talking about

**princess™ (18:13)**

when we played ddr

you went easy on me

**sharpshooter (18:13)**

pfft

no i didnt

**princess™ (18:14)**

your score when you played with keith was double your score when you played with me

**sharpshooter (18:14)**

thats cause i needed some time to warm up

**princess™ (18:14)**

ive seen u play enough times to know when you're going easy on someone

you cant fool me

**sharpshooter (18:15)**

oh wow using my own line against me

**princess™ (18:15)**

you had it coming

**sharpshooter (18:18)**

can you promise me something

**princess™ (18:18)**

depends on what youre asking

**sharpshooter (18:19)**

promise me that you wont mope around in your room for the entire week

i know its tough because your moms death anniversary just passed

**princess™ (18:20)**

i haven't been moping

**sharpshooter (18:20)**

liar

romelle told me

**princess™ (18:20)**

damn i didnt think she would sell me out like this

**sharpshooter (18:20)**

she cares about you

we all do

so u promise?

**princess™ (18:21)**

i'll try

**sharpshooter (18:21)**

okay

**princess™ (18:21)**

thank you

for today

the distraction helped a lot

**sharpshooter (18:21)**

anytime

* * *

_**2007 emo kid + space dad** _

**2007 emo kid (18:38)**

okay so

remember when i walked in on you and adam making out on our couch 6 years ago?

**space dad (18:39)**

...yes

**2007 emo kid (18:39)**

and i wanted to gouge my eyeballs out because it was literally the grossest thing i had ever seen in my short 15 years of living

and no adolescent should ever have to be exposed to that

**space dad (18:39)**

Is there a point to this conversation?

**2007 emo kid (18:39)**

also, remember at that exact moment, i had sworn to myself that i would never fall in love with anyone ever?

**space dad (18:40)**

I very clearly remember because you wouldn't shut up about it for the next 2 weeks

**2007 emo kid (18:40)**

well guess what

that was a fucking lie

i think i like lance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that season 8 trailer has me so fucking shook. i can't believe the final season of vld is going to air in less than 2 weeks


	9. what now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **power of god & anime (19:01)**
> 
> oh so you're gonna completely disregard my charm and good looks?
> 
> **space dad (19:01)**
> 
> The only charm you have is the lucky charms cereal you stole from lance last month
> 
> I know it was you, fucker
> 
> **power of god & anime (19:02)**
> 
> BACK TO THE TOPIC AT HAND

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shiro is trying his best™

_**2007 emo kid + space dad** _

**space dad (18:41)**

What now 

**2007 emo kid (18:41)**

i like lance

**space dad (18:41)**

You like him?

Or you  _like_ him

**2007 emo kid (18:41)**

what are we, six?

**space dad (18:42)**

I'm 6 and a half, to be exact

**2007 emo kid (18:42)**

oh my god

im over here having a gay crisis

and you're acting like a first grader

forget it

i'll ask adam for help

**space dad (18:42)**

Adam would have an easier time explaining rocket science to you than giving you advice on how to deal with your crush

**2007 emo kid (18:43)**

i mean

he's not that bad

**space dad (18:43)**

When we were 16, he tried to tell me about his feelings for me by giving me a box of hazelnut chocolate with a confession letter hidden inside

Except he completely forgot about my severe nut allergy, and i almost ended up in the hospital

AND i never found the letter 

**2007 emo kid (18:44)**

that was one time

**space dad (18:44)**

Remember when he tried to impress me by helping some kid at the park get his kite out from a tree

Except while attempting to do so, he managed to accidently anger a nest of hornets

And this time, it _did_ end with a trip to the hospital

At least the kid got his kite though

Would you like me to continue?

**2007 emo kid (18:45)**

please dont

so,,, adam isn't the,,, smoothest person out there

but

**space dad (18:45)**

But?

**2007 emo kid (18:46)**

fuck

im stuck with you arent i

**space dad (18:46)**

Unfortunately

**2007 emo kid (18:46)**

i hate this goddamn family

**space dad (18:47)**

When did you find out

**2007 emo kid (18:47)**

like

today

i guess

i was just watching him play some dumb arcade game

and my brain suddenly went

"surprise bitch, you like him"

**space dad (18:47)**

Are you gonna tell him?

**2007 emo kid (18:47)**

haha,,, ha

very funny

**space dad (18:48)**

Keith

**2007 emo kid (18:48)**

i cant

do you know how fucking awkward that would be

i'd just make him uncomfortable

**space dad (18:48)**

What if he has feelings for you too?

**2007 emo kid (18:48)**

are you kidding me

he hasn't shown ANY interest in me

up until a few weeks ago, i thought he didn't even like hanging out with me

i dont want to fuck up our friendship

**space dad (18:49)**

What are you gonna do then

**2007 emo kid (18:49)**

i dont know

im really confused

please dont tell anyone else about this

**space dad (18:50)**

I wont

But still, you cant bottle up your emotions like this

**2007 emo kid (18:50)**

*kicks several emotion bottles under my bed* i would never

* * *

_**power of god & anime + space dad** _

**space dad (18:51)**

I need your help

**power of god & anime (18:58)**

im not bailing you out of jail again

**space dad (18:58)**

MATT THAT WAS ONE TIME

Are you ever going to get over that

**power of god & anime (18:58)**

am i ever going to get over takashi shirogane, the man, the myth, the legend, the top student at the garrison, the textbook definition of "teachers pet", the role model of the century, punching some fucker for being biphobic towards me?

and then promptly getting arrested afterwards?

nope, never

**space dad (18:59)**

That asshole deserved it

I have no regrets

Anyways, back to the topic at hand

I have a hypothetical question

**power of god & anime (18:59)**

shoot

**space dad (19:00)**

So imagine

You have feelings for this guy who you're friends with

But you're afraid of confessing to him because you dont want to make him feel unconfortable/awkward

And you also dont want to mess up your friendship

**power of god & anime (19:00)**

hmM shiro sounds like you're confessing to me

**space dad (19:01)**

Please, your awful pickup lines could never win me over

**power of god & anime (19:01)**

oh so you're gonna completely disregard my charm and good looks?

**space dad (19:01)**

The only charm you have is the lucky charms cereal you stole from lance last month

I know it was you, fucker

**power of god & anime (19:02)**

BACK TO THE TOPIC AT HAND

i feel like this "hypothetical person" should at least try to confess how they feel?

the other person might feel the same way

**space dad (19:02)**

But what the other person hasn't shown any romantic interest in them at all

**power of god & anime (19:02)**

even if they dont feel the same way, at least you'll know for sure and it'll be easier to move on

but maybe they  _have_ shown interest before but the "hypothetical person" has never noticed because they haven't been paying attention

**space dad (19:03)**

That sounds unlikely

**power of god & anime (19:03)**

sorry, whos the expert here again?

**space dad (19:03)**

Watching an unhealthy amount of romantic comedies does not make you an expert

**power of god & anime (19:04)**

excuse you, romantic comedies are VERY educational

for example, they've taught me that mutual pining happens way more often than you think

WHICH YOU WOULD KNOW IF YOU AGREED TO WATCH THEM WITH ME

**space dad (19:04)**

Maybe i'll agree to watch one as thanks for your advice

**power of god & anime (19:04)**

ARE YOU SERIOUS

I HAVE BEEN TRYING FOR YEARS

AND THIS IS ALL IT TOOK

THIS HYPOTHETICAL PERSON SHOULD'VE GOTTEN INTO THIS DILEMMA SOONER

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> feedback is appreciated!


	10. pizza topping discourse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **sharpshooter (13:11)**
> 
> so what im hearing is,,,
> 
> shiro is now single and ready to mingle
> 
> **2007 emo kid (13:11)**
> 
> get away from my brother, mcclain
> 
> **sharpshooter (13:11)**
> 
> dont tell me what to do, kogane
> 
> **rest in peace rover (13:12)**
> 
> i sense a lot of unresolved sexual tension here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> controversial pizza topping opinions ahead. you've been warned

_**october 13th, 2018** _

_**other space dad + space dad** _

**other space dad (12:56)**

what frozen pizza should i get

pepperoni or chicken and mushroom

**space dad (12:57)**

What kind of question is this

Pepperoni obviously

**other space dad (12:57)**

woah woah woah what do you have against chicken and mushroom

**space dad (12:57)**

Mushrooms don't belong on pizza

**other space dad (12:57)**

EXCUSE ME WHAT NOW

**space dad (12:58)**

What kind of person takes one look at a perfectly good slice of pizza and goes "oh you know what'll make this even better? mushrooms"

**other space dad (12:58)**

discrimination

who are you to decide what toppings do and do not belong on pizza

**space dad (12:58)**

I have impeccable taste 

**other space dad (12:59)**

i call bullshit

you're the only fucker who can stomach my cooking

if thats not evidence that theres something wrong with your taste buds then i dont know what is

**space dad (12:59)**

Did you just insult yourself to prove a point?

**other space dad (12:59)**

yes because my point is VALID

you have terrible taste

both in pizza toppings AND in men

**space dad (12:59)**

Okay babe, you've reached your self deprecation limit for the day

**other space dad (13:00)**

are you kidding me? im just getting started

**space dad (13:00)**

Babe, no

**other space dad (13:00)**

you know what, ive changed my mind

im gonna get hawaiian

**space dad (13:00)**

FUCKER

YOU KNOW I HATE PINEAPPLE ON PIZZA

**other space dad (13:01)**

yes, i do

**space dad (13:01)**

Adam i swear to god i will break up with you

**other space (13:01)**

hmm

how many boxes should i get

do you think 12 is enough?

**space dad (13:02)**

ADAM

**other space dad (13:02)**

yeah, you're right

make that 16

**space dad (13:02)**

Why do you love to see me suffer

**other space dad (13:02)**

its my kink stop shaming me

**space dad (13:03)**

_ADAM_

Here lies Takashi Shirogane 1992 — 2018

Cause of death: hawaiian pizza

Are you happy now?

Your boyfriends dead

**other space dad (13:03)**

eh, i was bound to kill him in an arguement over pizza toppings sooner or later

**space dad (13:03)**

Cause of death: ~~hawaiian pizza~~ brutally stabbed to death by his god awful boyfriend

**other space dad (13:04)**

okay, SOMETIMES i get a lil intense with the knifeplay but i wouldn't call it "brutally stabbing" 

**space dad (13:04)**

I'm blocking you

**other space dad (13:04)**

you're just afraid of the truth

_**space dad has blocked you** _

* * *

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**other space dad (13:04)**

hey could someone go tell shiro to unblock his loving boyfriend

**2007 emo kid (13:05)**

what'd you do this time

**other space dad (13:05)**

i didnt even do anything

**power of god & anime (13:06)**

oh so you're not even gonna try and make up a believable excuse?

**other space (13:06)**

okay answer me this: does pineapple belong on pizza

**2007 emo kid (13:06)**

no?

**other space dad (13:06)**

you're shiro's brother so you dont count

he probably brainwashed you years ago

**2007 emo kid (13:06)**

what the fuck?

**power of god & anime (13:07)**

oh so are you gonna disregard my answer too because im his best friend and he probably brainwashed me too?

**other space dad (13:07)**

thats a great idea!

@everyone other than these two brainwashed fools: does pineapple belong on pizza

**sharpshooter (13:09)**

100% YES

THERE IS NO ARGUEMENT TO BE HAD

HAWAIIAN PIZZA IS A BLESSING FROM THE HEAVENS

**other space dad (13:09)**

finally, someone around here with sense

**kiss the cook (13:09)**

I dont personally like it but everyone has different taste

**other space dad (13:10)**

hunk, i appreciate you being civil about your dislike for pineapple on pizza, but im still gonna have to end this friendship

**kiss the cook (13:10)**

You know what

I retract my previous statement

Pineapple DOES NOT and WILL NEVER belong on pizza

**space dad (13:10)**

This is why hunk is my favourite child

**other space dad (13:10)**

im breaking up with you

**sharpshooter (13:11)**

so what im hearing is,,,

shiro is now single and ready to mingle

**2007 emo kid (13:11)**

get away from my brother, mcclain

**sharpshooter (13:11)**

dont tell me what to do, kogane

**rest in peace rover (13:12)**

i sense a lot of unresolved sexual tension here

**power of god & anime (13:12)**

i can't believe you came out of hiding just to call lance and keith out on their bs

**space dad (13:12)**

No lance i will not date you

**sharpshooter (13:12)**

didnt even give a guy a chance smh

**space dad (13:13)**

Sorry but my heart still belongs to someone else

**other space dad (13:13)**

aw

that was sweet

**space dad (13:13)**

It belongs to pizza _without_  pineapples or mushrooms on it

**other space (13:13)**

YOU'RE SUCH AN ASSHOLE

**space dad (13:13)**

But i'm your asshole

**rest in peace rover (13:14)**

please never say that ever again

**other space dad (13:14)**

love you too, asshole

BUT THIS ARGUEMENT ISN'T OVER

we will continue it when i get home

then whenever you make a valid point, i can kiss you to shut you up

**space dad (13:14)**

You know, im not opposed to that

Gonna have to start thinking of some valid points

**2007 emo kid (13:14)**

****gross

**sharpshooter (13:15)**

sappy losers 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> did i base a whole chapter around adam and shiro having a domestic arguement over pizza toppings? yes, yes i did
> 
> i absolutely live for lance and keith calling each other by their last names


	11. kosmo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **2007 emo kid (16:47)**
> 
> on a scale of one to ten
> 
> how much trouble would i be in for bringing home a stray dog

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have a lot of thoughts regarding season 8 but let's be real you didn't come here to listen to me talk about the season for like an hour so heres a whole ass chapter about kosmo because it's what he deserves

_**october 15th, 2018** _

_**2007 emo kid + rest in peace rover** _

**2007 emo kid (11:47)**

pidge i need your help

**2007 emo kid (11:48)**

answer your phone dumbass

**2007 emo kid (11:49)**

this is urgent

like really urgent

**2007 emo kid (11:50)**

please

im sorry for calling you a dumbass

**2007 emo kid (11:51)**

if you dont answer within the next minute im cancelling our buzzfeed unsolved marathon tonight

**rest in peace rover (11:51)**

you wouldn't dare

**2007 emo kid (11:51)**

FINALLY

**rest in peace rover (11:51)**

yeah yeah im here now what's wrong

**2007 emo kid (11:51)**

i found a stray dog

**rest in peace rover (11:51)**

im sorry what

**2007 emo kid (11:52)**

i dont know what to do

and im lowkey freaking out but thats fine im FINE

**rest in peace rover (11:52)**

oh my god

where are you

**2007 emo kid (11:52)**

alleyway near my apartment

**rest in peace rover (11:52)**

okay im on my way

try not to physically combust before i get there

**2007 emo kid (11:52)**

no promises

**2007 emo kid (11:54)**

please hurry up ha h a 

**rest in peace rover (11:54)**

im running as fast as my tiny dwarf legs can take me

* * *

_**our flat's a mess and so are we** _

_(2007 emo kid, other space dad, space dad)_

**2007 emo kid (16:47)**

on a scale of one to ten

how much trouble would i be in for bringing home a stray dog

**other space dad (16:47)**

please tell me you're joking

keith

**2007 emo kid (16:48)**

i think you know the answer to that question

**space dad (16:48)**

I'm coming home right now

* * *

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**rest in peace rover (17:31)**

good_boys.jpg

**kiss the cook (17:31)**

PIDGE WHATAJSJDH

**sharpshooter (17:31)**

HOYL SHIT

**kiss the cook (17:31)**

LOOK AT THAT GOOD BOY™

**power of god & anime (17:32)**

10/10 THE BESTEST BOY

**princess™ (17:32)**

THIS PHOTO IS NOT WHAT I EXPECTED TO RECEIVE TODAY BUT ITS SURE AS HELL THE ONE I DESERVED

**sharpshooter (17:32)**

IS THE DOG NUZZLING KEITH

BYE IM SOFT

**princess™ (17:32)**

whats his name?

**rest in peace rover (17:32)**

his name keith and hes half human half alien

**2007 emo kid (17:33)**

ET is my dad

**princess™ (17:33)**

we already knew that

i was talking about the dog

**rest in peace rover (17:33)**

you didn't specify

his name is kosmo and hes a border collie

we found him earlier today

**princess™ (17:34)**

you guys found him?

**rest in peace rover (17:34)**

technically keith found him in an alleyway

then he freaked out and asked me for help

**sharpshooter (17:34)**

typical

**kiss the cook (17:34)**

Did you find his owner?

**2007 emo kid (17:35)**

unfortunately no

he didn't have an id tag or chip

we tried taking him to a shelter but they were full so we're holding onto him for the time being while they try to find its owner

and pidge for the last time we are _not_ naming him kosmo

**rest in peace rover (17:35)**

BUT ITS SUCH A GOOD NAME

**power of god & anime (17:35)**

ohhh no no no no

this is exactly what happened with bae bae

**sharpshooter (17:35)**

your family dog?

**power of god & anime (17:36)**

yeah

we didnt plan on keeping him in the first place

but then toddler pidge just HAD to start calling him bae bae

which i think was her attempt to say the word baby but who the fuck knows

and the name stuck

and we got attached

and here we are

**2007 emo kid (17:36)**

thats exactly what i dont want to happen

which is why we are not naming him at all

**rest in peace rover (17:36)**

sorry keith but the damage has already been done

**princess™ (17:36)**

hey do me a favour and tell KOSMO that i love him and would gladly give my life for his

**2007 emo kid (17:37)**

allura what the fuck kind of betrayal is this

**sharpshooter (17:37)**

ive only had _kosmo_ for a day and a half but if anything happened to him i would kill everyone in this room and then myself

**2007 emo kid (17:37)**

i need new friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hhh voltron may be over but the characters and the show will always have a special place in my heart


	12. code red

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **sharpshooter (18:37)**
> 
> WE HAVE A CODE RED
> 
> **princess™ (18:40)**
> 
> lance how many times do i have to tell you
> 
> you can't call a code red whenever troye from physics flirts with you
> 
> **sharpshooter (18:40)**
> 
> i am a disaster bisexual and it is my god given right to be dramatic

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's currently less than an hour from midnight where i live, so im basically using my last few hours of 2018 to post this chapter 
> 
> happy 2019 yall

_**october 18th, 2018** _

_**2007 emo kid + princess™** _

**2007 emo kid (14:56)**

allura i need boy advice

**princess™ (14:56)**

ALL MY LIFE IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS DAY TO COME

**2007 emo kid (14:57)**

nevermind

**princess™ (14:57)**

nO WAIT

will you come back if i promise to stop being overdramatic

**2007 emo kid (14:57)**

we both know thats a promise you can't keep

**princess™ (14:57)**

sometimes i hate that you know me so well

**2007 emo kid (14:58)**

eh, sometimes i hate me too

**princess™ (14:58)**

keith oh my god

okay back to boy advice

**2007 emo kid (14:58)**

right

so you know tyler?

**princess™ (14:59)**

the one in our PR class?

**2007 emo kid (14:59)**

yeah

he asked me out

on saturday

**princess™ (14:59)**

holy SHIT

**2007 emo kid (14:59)**

and i dont know if i should say yes

**princess™ (15:00)**

why not?

hes rly cute

**2007 emo kid (15:00)**

i know

**princess™ (15:00)**

if i wasn't a huge ass lesbian i'd tap that

so,, are you gonna say yes?

**2007 emo kid (15:01)**

should i?

**princess™ (15:01)**

i say go for it

but ultimately its your decision

**2007 emo kid (15:01)**

decisions are hard

can i pay you to make them for me

**princess™ (15:01)**

did he do something?

because i swear to god if he did i will kick his ass so fucking hard

**2007 emo kid (15:02)**

allura NO

he didnt do anything

hes literally the sweetest person thats ever asked me out

but its just

**princess™ (15:02)**

its just?

**2007 emo kid (15:02)**

nevermind

maybe i will go

it might do me good

thanks allura

**princess™ (15:03)**

i should start charging for advice

u know maybe i'll start now

would you like to pay with cash or credit?

**2007 emo kid (15:03)**

i'll venmo you 12¢

**princess™ (15:03)**

good luck on your date

remember to use protection!

**2007 emo kid (15:03)**

JESUS CHRIST ALLURA

* * *

_**october 19th, 2018** _

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**sharpshooter (18:37)**

WE HAVE A CODE RED

**princess™ (18:40)**

lance how many times do i have to tell you

you can't call a code red whenever troye from physics flirts with you

**sharpshooter (18:40)**

i am a disaster bisexual and it is my god given right to be dramatic

BUT ANWAYS THIS ISNT ABOUT TROYE THIS CONCERNS HUNKS LOVE LIFE

**princess™ (18:41)**

i take it all back

im here and at your service

**power of god & anime (18:41)**

ready to put my life on the line

**kiss the cook (18:41)**

Why are you guys so invested in my love life

**power of god & anime (18:42)**

i live vicariously through yours because i lack my own

**rest in peace rover (18:42)**

will you just tell us what happened already

**sharpshooter (18:42)**

okay so the good news is

hunk has a date with shay

**power of god & anime (18:42)**

wHAT

**kiss the cook (18:42)**

Allura i can hear you screaming from down the hall please stop

**rest in peace rover (18:43)**

THIS COFFEE SHOP AU IS REALLY COMING TO LIFE HUH

**sharpshooter (18:43)**

allura pls our ears hurt v bad

**princess™ (18:43)**

LET ME HAVE THIS

**sharpshooter (18:43)**

im this close to coming to your dorm and shoving a pillow in your face

**princess™ (18:43)**

BOLD OF YOU TO ASSUME THAT'LL STOP ME

**rest in peace rover (18:44)**

as much as i'd like to see allura get choked

**princess™ (18:44)**

mm choke me dad

**rest in peace rover (18:44)**

u gotta tell us what the bad news is

**sharpshooter (18:44)**

oh

yeah

well uh

hunk why don't you explain what happened

**kiss the cook (18:45)**

Do I have to

**sharpshooter (18:45)**

yes

**kiss the cook (18:45)**

@ god why

**power of god & anime (18:45)**

hurry up yall

**kiss the cook (18:46)**

Alright fine

So I go up to shay and say "hey! I was wondering if you wanted to have dinner with me tomorrow?"

And her face breaks out into this beautiful smile

Have i told you guys about how gorgeous her smile is oh my god

**sharpshooter (18:46)**

as sweet as it is to hear you wax poetic about shay, you kinda need to continue the story

**kiss the cook (18:46)**

My bad

Anyways, shay goes "yeah of course! Just the two of us?"

And at this exact moment, my last two braincells conveniently decide to stop functioning

Which is why i say "oh! Lance will be joining us too"

**rest in peace rover (18:47)**

now u fucked up

**princess™ (18:47)**

are you serious

**kiss the cook (18:47)**

The story doesn't end there though

**sharpshooter (18:47)**

yeah go ahead and tell them what you said next

**kiss the cook (18:48)**

I uh

I may or may not have panicked after seeing her disappointed expression and yelled "like a double date!"

**princess™ (18:48)**

FUCKIDNSGSHS

**power of god & anime (18:48)**

oh my GOD

i need a minute

**rest in peace rover (18:49)**

sometimes i think hunk is the most functional out of all of us

but then he goes and does shit like this

and reminds me that he's just as dysfunctional as the rest of us

**sharpshooter (18:49)**

so, long story short

one lucky person will have the privilege of being my fake date tomorrow

**2007 emo kid (18:50)**

what happened here why does lance need a fake date

**rest in peace rover (18:50)**

gasp

keith was summoned the moment lance mentioned he needed a date

**2007 emo kid (18:50)**

i hate you

**space dad (18:50)**

Coincidence? i think not

**2007 emo kid (18:51)**

when i get home im dipping your toothbrush into the toilet bowl

**space dad (18:51)**

You wouldn't

**2007 emo kid (18:51)**

try me

**sharpshooter (18:51)**

i hate to interrupt your brotherly bonding time but we have an emergency at hand

**princess™ (18:52)**

alright lets weigh our options

**2007 emo kid (18:52)**

can't pidge or allura cover for you?

**rest in peace rover (18:52)**

as much as i'd love to be lance's fake date and embarrass him in front of shay

i can't cause matt and i are driving upstate to visit our parents for the weekend

**sharpshooter (18:53)**

allura?

**princess™ (18:53)**

sorry lance

but i already promised romelle that i'd follow her to a job interview

won't be able to help this time :(

**sharpshooter (18:53)**

so much for being ready to put your life on the line

**kiss the cook (18:54)**

Theres still one more person

**2007 emo kid (18:54)**

no

no no no no

**kiss the cook (18:54)**

Please?

I'll make you lasagna as payment

**2007 emo kid (18:54)**

damn you for knowing my weakness

**sharpshooter (18:55)**

cmon keith

**2007 emo kid (18:55)**

but i

**sharpshooter (18:55)**

for hunk?

**2007 emo kid (18:56)**

,,,

for the record, im only doing this for the lasagna

**kiss the cook (18:56)**

THANK YOU KEITH

**sharpshooter (18:56)**

OPERATION HUNAY IS OFFICIALLY IN ORDER

**2007 emo kid (18:56)**

god

ive made a grave mistake

**rest in peace rover (18:57)**

hey look guys we've found the perfect phrase to describe the entireity of keith's existence

* * *

_**2007 emo kid + princess™** _

**princess™ (18:57)**

contrary to popular belief, under that mask of teen angst, keith kogane is an actual person that has real emotions and cares for his friends 

**2007 emo kid (18:57)**

i'll kill you if you tell anyone

**princess™ (18:58)**

what, you'll kill me if i tell everyone you cancelled your actual date with tyler to go on a fake date with lance?

**2007 emo kid (18:58)**

yes

**princess™ (18:58)**

you choose the weirdest things to keep secret

**2007 emo kid (18:58)**

i just don't want hunk to feel bad or anything

**princess™ (18:59)**

aw

you're sweeter than we give you credit for

**2007 emo kid (18:59)**

no im not

emotions™? never heard of those before

**princess™ (18:59)**

you'll come around one day 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just a heads up, i probably won't be able to update as frequently in the future because of school and everything, but i'll try my best
> 
> (psst i may or may not be working on another fic as well but you didn't hear that from me)


	13. unfashionable kings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **sharpshooter (18:11)**
> 
> nice to know keith's date attire matches his horrendous fashion sense
> 
> **2007 emo kid (18:11)**
> 
> i did it on purpose to match your horrendous outfit
> 
> **sharpshooter (18:11)**
> 
> EXCUSE ME
> 
> **princess™ (18:12)**
> 
> we stan unfashionable kings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ive been trying to get this chapter out for so long shshdhd

_**october 20th, 2018** _

_**2007 emo kid + space dad** _

**2007 emo kid (16:17)**

TAKASHI SHIROGAMER

**space dad (16:17)**

DONT YOU DARE MENTION THAT NAME IN MY PRESENCE

**2007 emo kid (16:18)**

i need help

**space dad (16:18)**

And the first thing you thought to say was _that?_

**2007 emo kid (16:18)**

desperate times call for desperate measures 

what does one wear to a date

**space dad (16:19)**

Are you

Are you asking me for fashion advice?

**2007 emo kid (16:19)**

god, i've really hit rock bottom haven't i

**space dad (16:19)**

Yeah, you have

I'll be over in 10

**2007 emo kid (16:19)**

have i ever told you how much i love you

**space dad (16:20)**

Dont think ive forgotten about you calling me takashi shirogamer

* * *

_**2007 emo kid + sharpshooter** _

**2007 emo kid (18:02)**

LANCE LET ME IN

**sharpshooter (18:03)**

give me a sec

**2007 emo kid (18:03)**

THATS WHAT YOU'VE BEEN SAYING FOR THE PAST HALF AN HOUR

**sharpshooter (18:03)**

okay thats a lie

its only been like 27 minutes

**2007 emo kid (18:04)**

day 43: lance still won't let me into his apartment

my only companions are the cheap thrift store welcome mat with questionable stains and the lizard chilling on the ceiling. i've choosen to name him barry.

**sharpshooter (18:04)**

is barry the welcome mat or the lizard?

**2007 emo kid (18:04)**

yes 

**sharpshooter (18:05)**

also, barry was the best name you could come up with?

what, were you inspired by the bee movie?

**2007 emo kid (18:05)**

woah woah woah

why're you bullying barry

jealous that he's a better friend than you are?

**sharpshooter (18:06)**

oh im sorry

has barry ever drove you home because you were drunk off your ass from a drinking competition that you didnt even manage to win?

**2007 emo kid (18:06)**

no, but he's never left me stranded outside his apartment for half a fucking hour

i won't hesitate to break down this door, mcclain

**sharpshooter (18:06)**

i'd like to see you try

**sharpshooter (18:07)**

keith

keith stop bangiNG THE DOOR

KEITH I HAVE NEIGHBOURS

**2007 emo kid (18:07)**

you didnt seem to care about your neighbours when we were blasting fall out boy the other night at 1am

**sharpshooter (18:07)**

YOU

fucking hell

alright fine i concede defeat 

* * *

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**sharpshooter (18:11)**

nice to know keith's date attire matches his horrendous fashion sense

**2007 emo kid (18:11)**

i did it on purpose to match _your_ horrendous outfit

**sharpshooter (18:11)**

EXCUSE ME

**princess™ (18:12)**

we stan unfashionable kings

* * *

_**2007 emo kid + rest in peace rover** _

**2007 emo kid (18:12)**

shiro i cant do this

do you know how HOT he looks

he wasn't lying when he said blue was his colour

**rest in peace rover (18:12)**

uh

**2007 emo kid (18:13)**

OH FUCK YOU'RE NOT SHIRO

* * *

_**princess™ + sharpshooter** _

**sharpshooter (18:15)**

i lied

keith looks so good oh my god

**princess™ (18:16)**

i know we say this all the time but

you are so hopeless

**sharpshooter (18:16)**

i know

god i know

* * *

_**2007 emo kid + rest in peace rover** _

**rest in peace rover (18:13)**

so,, you think lance is hot?

**2007 emo kid (18:13)**

hot as in

like

summer

yknow

**rest in peace rover (18:13)**

its fall

**2007 emo kid (18:14)**

its a metaphor, obviously

**rest in peace rover (18:14)**

mhm

**2007 emo kid (18:14)**

can we

not talk about this right now

**rest in peace rover (18:15)**

only if you promise not to ignore my texts later

or cancel our movie marathon on sunday in an attempt to avoid me

**2007 emo kid (18:15)**

you just love foiling my plans, dont you

* * *

_**kiss the cook + sharpshooter** _

**kiss the cook (18:27)**

you guys at the diner already?

**sharpshooter (18:27)**

yeah

u feeling okay?

**kiss the cook (18:28)**

honestly? yeah

thought i would be more nervous about this but shay is so easygoing and it feels so natural and i just

i really like her

**sharpshooter (18:28)**

sap

stop making me cry

now get off your phone and go talk to the love of your life

**kiss the cook (18:28)**

love of my life? lance, its our first date

**sharpshooter (18:29)**

you say that now but im the one thats gonna have the last laugh at your wedding in 10 years time 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wanted to say a quick thank you for all the kudos and comments because they really motivate me to write more chapters


	14. kardashian kogane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **rest in peace rover (18:46)**
> 
> remind me again why we consider allura the responsible one
> 
> **sharpshooter (18:46)**
> 
> she bullshits her way through life better than any of us do
> 
> and she has exceptional fashion sense
> 
> **power of god & anime (18:47)**
> 
> no i think that award goes to adam
> 
> the bullshitting one, obviously
> 
> not the fashion one
> 
> **other space dad (18:47)**
> 
> you wound me
> 
> **2007 emo kid (18:47)**
> 
> _definitely_ not the fashion one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's been 84 years
> 
> heres chapter 14

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**sharpshooter (18:43)**

lance here, reporting live at the scene of the double date

as usual, shay is being an absolute sweetheart, radiating kindness and love

hunk is admiring shay like she's an angel on earth, which, let's be real, she probably is

keith ordered spaghetti bolgnese and,, well,,

let's just say his collection of stained shirts is about to welcome a new member real soon

**2007 emo kid (18:44)**

aaand thats my cue to subtlely change the topic

im caling it now, hunay is going to be the power couple of the century

**princess™ (18:44)**

YWES

POWRR COUPELE

**other space dad (18:44)**

ignore her

shes drunk

**princess™ (18:45)**

NO AM USNOT

**2007 emo kid (18:45)**

do i wanna know?

**other space dad (18:45)**

she and romelle went to a bar to celebrate romelles job interview going well and

**sharpshooter (18:45)**

allura got blackout drunk, didnt she

**other space dad (18:46)**

as always

shiro and i are driving them home now

**rest in peace rover (18:46)**

remind me again why we consider allura the responsible one

**sharpshooter (18:46)**

she bullshits her way through life better than any of us do

and she has exceptional fashion sense

**power of god & anime (18:47)**

no i think that award goes to adam

the bullshitting one, obviously

not the fashion one

**other space dad (18:47)**

you wound me

**2007 emo kid (18:47)**

_definitely_ not the fashion one

**other space dad (18:47)**

keith kardashian kogane, don't you dare speak to me like that

**rest in peace rover (18:47)**

KARDASHIAN

**2007 emo kid (18:48)**

that's not my middle name and you know it

**other space dad (18:48)**

you can't prove otherwise, kardashian

**2007 emo kid (18:48)**

i will astral project back home to retrieve my birth certificate and prove you wrong

**rest in peace rover (18:48)**

only a kardashian would do something so extra

**2007 emo kid (18:49)**

you've clearly never met a mcclain then

**sharpshooter (18:49)**

guys im RIGHT HERE

* * *

_**2007 emo kid + sharpshooter** _

**sharpshooter (19:11)**

ok dont look but

**2007 emo kid (19:11)**

i don't like where this is going

**sharpshooter (19:11)**

theres some guy at the table behind us staring at you

KEITH I SAID DONT LOOK

you were /so/ obvious oh my god

do u know him?

**sharpshooter (19:12)**

hello?

earth to keith

**2007 emo kid (19:12)**

i

yeah

hes from my PR class

tyler

**sharpshooter (19:12)**

so THATS why he looked familiar

hold on doesn't hunk know him from freshman year or something

**2007 emo kid (19:13)**

he does?

**sharpshooter (19:13)**

give me a sec

**2007 emo kid (19:13)**

wh

lance no

LANCE

* * *

_**2007 emo kid + sharpshooter** _

**sharpshooter (19:15)**

keith kogane what the fuck

where are you

**2007 emo kid (19:15)**

washroom

**sharpshooter (19:15)**

why'd you run off like that??

**2007 emo kid (19:16)**

hunk was calling tyler over

didn't want him to see me

**sharpshooter (19:16)**

why?

**sharpshooter (19:18)**

keith dont you dare leave me on read

explain

**2007 emo kid (19:18)**

,, do i have to

**sharpshooter (19:18)**

either that or i'll ask tyler myself

**2007 emo kid (19:18)**

NO

dont ask please

i'll tell you

so uh

**sharpshooter (19:19)**

thats not a very good explanation

**2007 emo kid (19:19)**

i orginally had plans today

with tyler

we were

**sharpshooter (19:20)**

you were?

**2007 emo kid (19:20)**

supposed to go on a date

**sharpshooter (19:20)**

wh,, what

**2007 emo kid (19:21)**

but then the whole thing w shay happened 

and i didn't wanna let you guys down

so i /may/ have

sort of

faked being sick

which involves me,, yknow,, resting at home

and not being here

with you guys

**sharpshooter (19:22)**

oh

fuck

im sorry

**2007 emo kid (19:22)**

?

why're you blaming yourself for this

it wasn't even your fault

**sharpshooter (19:22)**

i shouldn't have made you come

**2007 emo kid (19:22)**

you /didn't/ though

i willingly cancelled my plans

**sharpshooter (19:23)**

you shouldn't have had to

**2007 emo kid (19:23)**

lance

1\. you didn't know i had plans w tyler

2\. you/hunk didn't force me to come, i made the decision to do so myself

3\. you guys mean more to me than any date ever will

**sharpshooter (19:23)**

i just wanted to let you know that hunk is reading this over my shoulder and will most definitely bombard you in thank you hugs when this whole thing is over

**2007 emo kid (19:24)**

goddammit lance

you're shattering my emo bad boy reputation

**sharpshooter (19:24)**

we all been knew you were a softie at heart

**2007 emo kid (19:24)**

if anyone asks

i did it purely for the lasagna

not "friendship" or whatever

**sharpshooter (19:24)**

i'll keep that in mind

now come out here bc we've still got a fake date to finish

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i started reading squad up by astralscivener recently and its actually what motivated me to update!
> 
> everybody (me) say thank you astralscivener


	15. operation dumbass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **sharpshooter (16:25)**
> 
> pidge will be in charge of choosing the most absurd alien documentaries and the best bf unsolved eps for us to watch together
> 
> **rest in peace rover (16:26)**
> 
> bold of you to assume they're not all the best

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaa ive been wanting to write about keiths bd for a while now but i had to wait for the dates to line up and all but anyways it finally did so here it is

_**october 22nd, 2018** _

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**2007 emo kid (10:39)**

peter parker, also known as the popular superhero 'spiderman', is roughly 16-17 years old, meaning he was born in either 2001 or 2002. contrary to popular belief, this places him firmly in the 'gen z' category, rather than the millennial category that many place him in. by extrapolating this information, we can conclude that peter parker not only knows what a furry is, but constantly has to grapple with the fact that his spider-centric identity is, in fact, his fursona. in this essay i will

**power of god & anime (10:39)**

wheres the rest of the essay

**princess™ (10:39)**

he got murdered before he could finish it

**rest in peace rover (10:40)**

okay but technically wouldn't it be his arachnid-sona

**power of god & anime (10:40)**

keith send the rest of the essay you coward

i'll pay you my entire life savings

**kiss the cook (10:40)**

Your bank account consists solely of monopoly dollars

**power of god & anime (10:40)**

my offer still stands

**space dad (10:41)**

Keith what the fuck dont you have a class right now

**2007 emo kid (10:41)**

THAT WASNT ME

IT WAS LANCE

HE STOLE MY PHONE WHILE I WAS IN THE BATHROOM

**sharpshooter (10:41)**

not my fault your passcode is weak as fuck

who still uses their birthdate as their password

**2007 emo kid (10:42)**

who are YOU to be criticizing my passcode choice, mr 1234

**sharpshooter (10:42)**

OKAY FIRST OF A

**2007 emo kid (10:42)**

his phone died

serves the fucker righshd kh

**kiss the cook (10:43)**

Lance

Give keith his phone back

**2007 emo kid (10:43)**

what do you mena

this is the rea keith

**kiss the cook (10:44)**

I cant believe this

Stop bickering

Jesus christ

The entire lecture hall is staring at both of you

**princess™ (10:44)**

only lance and keith would be dumb enough to do this shit during class

**kiss the cook (10:45)**

Pretty sure iverson can see yall too

**rest in peace rover (10:45)**

they're doing this in /iversons/ class?

**other space dad (10:46)**

i was about to ask "what the fuck were they thinking" but then i remembered these dumbasses have a combined iq of 7

**kiss the cook (10:46)**

Iverson is giving them the Look™

**rest in peace rover (10:47)**

hold on

tell him not to snap yet

i need to get popcorn

this is more exciting than any thriller film ive ever watched

**kiss the cook (10:47)**

Hes walking towards them

I dont think they've noticed yet

Oh he is Mad™ alright

**rest in peace rover (10:49)**

what happened 

hunk? u still there buddy?

**kiss the cook (10:50)**

THEY GOT KICKED OUT OF CLASS

**other space dad (10:50)**

god i wish you guys could see the look on shiros face right now

* * *

_**sharpshooter created the group "happy birthday, dumbass"**_  

_(kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**sharpshooter (16:19)**

we have two days

**space dad (16:19)**

Not sure if I should be more offended by you calling my dear brother a dumbass or the fact that you forgot his birthday was coming up

**sharpshooter (16:20)**

wh

I DID NOT FORGET

if anything you guys are the ones that forgot 

im the one who made the gc

**rest in peace rover (16:20)**

because the title of excessive gc maker had already been awarded to you and we didnt wanna steal that spotlight from you

you only remembered because of the phone password thing earlier 

**sharpshooter (16:20)**

wh 

no

i just

didnt wanna start planning too early

because we all know how THAT went last year

**kiss the cook (16:21)**

I told you guys i was /sorry/

**sharpshooter (16:21)**

keith: you guys have any plans later?

**kiss the cook (16:21)**

Please no

**sharpshooter (16:21)**

hunk: yeah me and lance are going to party city to—

me, panicking: to get some baking supplies because we're baking cookies 

**kiss the cook (16:22)**

I dont need a retelling of my mistakes

**sharpshooter (16:22)**

hunk, a certified genius: is that before or after we get supplies for the surprise party

**rest in peace rover (16:22)**

god whyd you have to make me go through that second hand embarrassment all over again

**sharpshooter (16:22)**

excuse me /you/ felt second hand embarrassment?

i was at the scene of the crime

imagine how /i/ felt

**kiss the cook (16:23)**

Okay we get it im a human disaster can we change the topic now

**princess™ (16:24)**

I CALL DIBS ON DECORATION

**power of god & anime (16:24)**

aw man you always call dibs on decoration

**rest in peace rover (16:24)**

we all know if you were put in charge of decorations the place would look like the apocolypse threw up all over the living room

**power of god & anime (16:24)**

is that not the aesthetic we're going for

**rest in peace rover (16:25)**

no i was thinking more alien invasion style

**sharpshooter (16:25)**

no and no

both of you are not allowed ANYWHERE near the decorations

allura and i will be in charge of those

pidge will be in charge of choosing the most absurd alien documentaries and the best bf unsolved eps for us to watch together

**rest in peace rover (16:26)**

bold of you to assume they're not all the best

**sharpshooter (16:26)**

shiro and adam will distract keith while we prep

**space dad (16:27)**

Can't believe we got stuck with the boring job

**other space dad (16:27)**

oh shut up

we all know you love him and that you're secretly really excited to spend time w him

**space dad (16:27)**

I am appalled™

**sharpshooter (16:27)**

hunk is in charge of the cake (obviously we all saw that coning)

**power of god & anime (16:28)**

what about me?

**sharpshooter (16:28)**

you help hunk with the cake and make sure he doesn't accidently reveal anything

**kiss the cook (16:28)**

Why am i constantly reminded of my mistakes

**princess™ (16:28)**

it makes us feel better about ourselves

**sharpshooter (16:29)**

alright guys

operation dumbass is a go

**space dad (16:29)**

We are not calling it that

**sharpshooter (16:29)**

I REPEAT OPERATION DUMBASS IS A GO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the most unrealistic thing about this fic is that they all respond in like 0.2 seconds which is /not/ how things work irl
> 
> not gonna lie im really excited to write about the actual party so im gonna try to get the next chap out as soon as possible


	16. whats klance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **princess™ (16:33)**
> 
> overall, decorations are pretty decent
> 
> **sharpshooter (16:34)**
> 
> pretty decent? an insult to mr hippopants
> 
> **other space dad (16:34)**
> 
> i cant believe the moment i decide to open this chat the first thing i see is "an insult to mr hippopants"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> remember when i said i was gonna get this chap out asap? yeah i lied
> 
> ive been wanting to upload this chapter for so long now but i kind of got carried away and made this chapter thrice as long as other chapters (which i hope makes up for the long hiatus lol)
> 
> also, guess what? im a dumbass and i got keiths birthday wrong! canonically its 23rd october but i made it 24th october in this fic so i guess thats his birthday now

_**october 23rd, 2018** _

_**princess™ + sharpshooter** _

**sharpshooter (13:56)**

allura

hear me out

**princess™ (13:56)**

for the last time

we are /not/ getting peppa pig party hats

**sharpshooter (13:56)**

WHY NOT

**princess (13:56)**

IT DOESNT SUIT THE REST OF THE DECOR AT ALL

**sharpshooter (13:57)**

but MOM

please?

trust me it'll look good

**princess™ (13:57)**

lance sweetie i trust you with a lot of things but interior decorating is not one of them

**sharpshooter (13:57)**

sigh

didnt wanna have to do this but

**princess™(13:58)**

wh

lance

LANCE MCCLAIN IS THAT YOU RUNNING TOWARDS THE CHECK OUT LINE

L A N C E

 

* * *

 

_**power of god & anime + rest in peace rover** _

**power of god & anime (14:05)**

greetings

how is my dearest sister katie holt doing on this fine afternoon

**rest in peace rover (14:06)**

what do u want

**power of god & anime (14:06)**

oh sweet sibling of mine

can a brother not check on how their favourite person in the whole entire world is doing?

**rest in peace rover (14:06)**

cut the crap im in the middle of important buisness

**power of god & anime (14:06)**

shsgshs alright fine asshole

help me check how many eggs are in the fridge

**rest in peace rover (14:07)**

are you fucking kidding me

you interrupted me for this?

**power of god & anime (14:07)**

shut up we both know your "important buisness" is actually you binging netflix

**rest in peace rover (14:08)**

im doing this for keiths sake

**power of god & anime (14:08)**

could you be a kind soul and check how many eggs we have for keiths sake as well?

**rest in peace rover (14:08)**

woah woah woah

i am but merely a child

keiths nice and all but

thats too much to ask for

**power of god & anime (14:08)**

K A T I E

i need to know how many more eggs hunk and i have to get for the cake

so please

just check the goddamn fridge

i beg of you

**rest in peace rover (14:09)**

sorry

the old katie cant come to the phone right now

why?

**power of god & anime (14:09)**

CAUSE SHES DEAD to me

fuck you for using t swift against me

**rest in peace rover (14:09)**

sometimes u make it too easy

**power of god & anime (14:09)**

unbelievable

* * *

_**power of god & anime + rest in peace rover** _

**power of god & anime (14:17)**

according to hunk its better to be safe than sorry so

_[receipt.jpg]_

**rest in peace rover (14:17)**

matthew what the fuck

why did you buy 4 DOZEN eggs

**power of god & anime (14:18)**

why the fuck not

**rest in peace rover (14:18)**

because THEY GO BAD

**power of god & anime (14:18)**

oh worm? they do?

guess if they're not finished by the end of the week i'll have to put them to another use

**rest in peace rover (14:18)**

if its an egg fight you want its an egg fight you'll get

i just hope you remember how the last one turned out

**power of god & anime (14:19)**

dont worry

i do

spite is exactly what fuels me :))

 

* * *

 

_**happy birthday, dumbass** _

_(kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**sharpshooter (16:27)**

STATUS UPDATE

HUNK AND MATT

**power of god & anime (16:30)**

doing good so far

yknow, other than the fact that my kitchen is an absolute fucking mess

**kiss the cook (16:30)**

And whos fault was that?

**power of god & anime (16:31)**

okay listen—

**sharpshooter (16:31)**

PIDGE

**rest in peace rover (16:31)**

ive got bfu 2 eps choosen so far and one movie

**power of god & anime (16:31)**

how have you only chosen 2 eps you've been watching for 3 hours

**rest in peace rover (16:32)**

brilliance takes time

**sharpshooter (16:32)**

hmM

**rest in peace rover (16:32)**

okay fiNE I GOT CARRIED AWAY WATCHING AND I FORGOT THE TASK AT HAND

ALSO ALL THE EPS ARE SO GOOD HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO CHOOSE

**sharpshooter (16:32)**

yeah that sounds about right

ALLURA AND LANCE

**princess™ (16:33)**

banner ✓

balloons ✓

party hats,, unfortunately ✓

**kiss the cook (16:33)**

why the unfortunately

**sharpshooter (16:33)**

you'll see

**power of god & anime (16:33)**

ominous

**princess™ (16:33)**

overall, decorations are pretty decent

**sharpshooter (16:34)**

pretty decent? an insult to mr hippopants

**other space dad (16:34)**

i cant believe the moment i decide to open this chat the first thing i see is "an insult to mr hippopants"

**power of god & anime (16:34)**

remind me again who mr hippopants is

**princess™ (16:34)**

its the name he gave the hippo on the banner

**kiss the cook (16:35)**

Theres a hippo,, on the banner?

**sharpshooter (16:35)**

excuse me mr hippopants has a NAME and you shall refer to him by it

**princess™ (16:35)**

he said it needed more pizzazz

**rest in peace rover (16:35)**

oh its gonna have pizzazz alright

**power of god & anime (16:36)**

hold on

hunk

what if we put a hippo on the cake

**kiss the cook (16:36)**

What if we what now

**sharpshooter (16:36)**

YES

**princess™ (16:37)**

no

**sharpshooter (16:37)**

MATTHEW HOLT

YOU'RE A GENIUS

**princess™ (16:37)**

hunk please dont let him go through with this

**kiss the cook (16:37)**

I mean,, its not a _bad_  idea

**sharpshooter (16:37)**

DAMN RIGHT ITS NOT A BAD IDEA

**power of god & anime (16:38)**

I'LL GET THE ICING

**princess™ (16:38)**

why do i even

 

 

* * *

 

 

_**october 24th, 2018** _

_**2007 emo kid + space dad** _

**space dad (00:00)**

Happy birthday kiddo

**2007 emo kid (00:00)**

did you really stay up till midnight just to be the first one to wish me happy birthday

**space dad (00:01)**

What makes you think that

**2007 emo kid (00:01)**

dont all old people go to bed at like 8pm

**space dad (00:01)**

Asshole

I'm only 6 years older than you

**2007 emo kid (00:02)**

sleep deprived you is not good at math

**space dad (00:02)**

?

**2007 emo kid (00:02)**

im 21 now

26 - 21 = 5

**space dad (00:02)**

Oh

Oh my god

OH YM GOD

You're 21 now

Fuck

**2007 emo kid (00:02)**

language

**space dad (00:02)**

How

I swear you were 15 yesterday

**2007 emo kid (00:03)**

shiro

**space dad (00:03)**

Where did my sweet baby brother go

**2007 emo kid (00:03)**

GOODNIGHT

**space dad (00:03)**

Seems as if it was only hours ago

That i was cradling a newborn in my arms

**2007 emo kid (00:04)**

takashi i was ADOPTED

**space dad (00:04)**

Shh its for dramatic effect

**2007 emo kid (00:04)**

i hate you

**space dad (00:04)**

You love me

**2007 emo kid (00:05)**

go to sleep

**space dad (00:05)**

Goodnight kiddo

Dont grow up too fast

**2007 emo kid (00:05)**

shiro i am a legal adult

**space dad (00:05)**

Love you

**2007 emo kid (00:06)**

yeah okay

goodnight

**2007 emo kid (00:08)**

love you too

 

* * *

 

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**rest in peace rover (08:16)**

ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWN

**sharpshooter (08:16)**

dududuDUUUU

**princess™ (08:17)**

DU DU DU DU DU

**kiss the cook (08:18)**

DUDUDUDU

**power of god & anime (08:18)**

DU DU DU DU _DUUUUU_

**sharpshooter (08:18)**

if you didnt read that while singing the tune in your head you're lying

**space dad (08:18)**

You fool

Only the weak give in

**other space dad (08:19)**

horton hears a bitch ass liar

you were humming it under your breath

**space dad (08:19)**

I am in fact, the weak

**2007 emo kid (08:19)**

so yall are just gonna text this with no context at 8am in the morning

**rest in peace rover (08:19)**

AND THE BIRTHDAY BOY FINALLY ARRIVES

**2007 emo kid (08:20)**

oh

**kiss the cook (08:20)**

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KEITH

**princess™ (08:20)**

HAPPY BIRTHDAY YOU ABSOLUTE GAY DISASTER

**sharpshooter (08:20)**

mlm and wlw solidarity at its finest

**power of god & anime (08:20)**

haPPY BIRTHDAY KEITH

**rest in peace rover (08:20)**

happy birthday to my partner in cryptid

**other space dad (08:21)**

happy birthday!1!1!

**sharpshooter (08:21)**

happy birthday samurai!

**2007 emo kid (08:21)**

thank you

thank you so much i

uh

**space dad (08:21)**

He's smiling so hard

**2007 emo kid (08:21)**

no im not

**other space dad (08:22)**

_[aww.jpg]_

he most definitely is

**princess™ (08:22)**

AW

**2007 emo kid (08:22)**

ADAM

**power of god & anime (08:22)**

anyone else immediately thought of the vine or

**princess™ (08:22)**

_[adamvine.mp4]_

**power of god & anime (08:22)**

allura here always pulling thru for me

**sharpshooter (08:23)**

as your wise and knowledgable senior, it is my legal obligation to offer you humble advice on this very day

**2007 emo kid (08:23)**

shut up mcclain you're only 3 months older than me

**sharpshooter (08:23)**

and yet you've never once caught up to me

**2007 emo kid (08:23)**

i will after i murder you in your sleep tonight

**princess™ (08:23)**

leave it to klance to make their age gap a competition too

**2007 emo kid (08:24)**

whats klance

* * *

_**lance has messed up** _

_(kiss the cook, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter)_

**princess™ (08:24)**

pidge i see u typing in the space rangers gc

dont do it hoe

**rest in peace rover (08:24)**

mmmM

im tempted

**sharpshooter (08:24)**

dunkin donuts

**rest in peace rover (08:24)**

how many are we talking here

**sharpshooter (08:25)**

half a dozen

**rest in peace rover (08:25)**

make it a dozen and you've got yourself a deal

**sharpshooter (08:25)**

deal

allura you're paying

**princess™ (08:25)**

but you

nvm fair enough

* * *

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**2007 emo kid (08:27)**

why are you all leaving me on read

the fuck is a klance?

killing lance? because if so i completely agree

**sharpshooter (08:27)**

lance

she meant lance

**2007 emo kid (08:27)**

why did it take you that long to reply

**rest in peace rover (08:27)**

bi panic

**2007 emo kid (08:27)**

im sorry what now

* * *

_**lance has messed up** _

_(kiss the cook, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter)_

**sharpshooter (08:27)**

dunkin donut privileges have been revoked

**rest in peace rover (08:27)**

okay but like can you blame me the opportunity was right there

 

* * *

 

_**2007 emo kid + sharpshooter** _

**sharpshooter (08:50)**

look behind you

**2007 emo kid (08:50)**

id rather not

**sharpshooter (08:50)**

just turn around you loser

**2007 emo kid (08:51)**

what the FUCK

WHY are you up there

**sharpshooter (08:51)**

getting starbucks

**2007 emo kid (08:51)**

you dont have morning classes today

also stop pressing your face against the glass you moron you look dumb and its unhygienic

**sharpshooter (08:51)**

first of all, i can do what i want im a legal adult 

at least thats what it says on my drivers id

and second of all

the drink is for you, loser 

**2007 emo kid (08:52)**

yknow that was almost sweet until you added the loser 

**sharpshooter (08:52)**

arent you flattered that i came all the way here at 8 in the morning for you

**2007 emo kid (08:52)**

truly my knight in shining armour

my lord and savior lancelot

**sharpshooter (08:52)**

okay i know u mean that ironically but lancelot would be a cool name to have

**2007 emo kid (08:53)**

maybe in like the 16th century

**sharpshooter (08:53)**

kogane do you want your caffeine or not

**2007 emo kid (08:53)**

depends on what you got me

**sharpshooter (08:53)**

:)

**2007 emo kid (08:54)**

lance

oh my god no

nononono

**sharpshooter (08:54)**

:)

**2007 emo kid (08:54)**

im walking away

goodbye

**sharpshooter (08:54)**

NO WAIT

KEITH

JUST TRY IT I PROMISE YOU THEY ARENT EVEN THAT BAD

**2007 emo kid (08:54)**

its my BIRTHDAY

**sharpshooter (08:55)**

i'll buy you another drink if you dont like it

**2007 emo kid (08:55)**

are you really this hell bent on getting me to try a psl

**sharpshooter (08:55)**

yes

**2007 emo kid (08:55)**

god

just come down w/ my goddamn drink

**sharpshooter (08:55)**

YOU WONT REGRET THIS

* * *

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**2007 emo kid (09:03)**

i regret everything

**kiss the cook (09:03)**

What did lance do

**2007 emo kid (09:04)**

three words: pumpkin spice latte

**kiss the cook (09:04)**

Called it

**sharpshooter (09:04)**

WHAT DO YOU MEAN CALLED IT

**kiss the cook (09:04)**

You left the house @ 8.30 today i knew u were up to something

**2007 emo kid (09:05)**

can we get back to the topic at hand aka my misery

**kiss the cook (09:05)**

Of course, please continue

**2007 emo kid (09:05)**

thank you

first of all

why the fuck

second of all

who the fuck

third of all

what the fuck

satan couldn't finish a psl if he TRIED

**sharpshooter (09:05)**

jokes on you asshole i ALREADY did

**power of god & anime (09:06)**

referring to yourself as the devil in order to defend the honour of PSLs? valid

**2007 emo kid (09:06)**

wrong, everyone in this chat is invalid

**space dad (09:06)**

Including yourself?

**2007 emo kid (09:06)**

look shiro i dont have time for logic right now

either you're on my side or you're not

**space dad (09:07)**

When did i ever say i was on your side

**other space dad (09:07)**

did you never notice that the few times shiro has a craving for starbucks coincide with the pumpkin spice latte release dates

**2007 emo kid (09:07)**

wh at

cant believe ive been betrayed by my own blood

**space dad (09:08)**

oh so NOW im your own blood?

_[screenshot.jpg]_

what happened to "takashi i was ADOPTED"

**2007 emo kid (09:08)**

SHHSDHHD SHIRO DONT CALL EM OUT LIKE THSI

 

* * *

 

_**space rangers** _

**power of god & anime (13:36)**

_[uno.jpg]_

they've been staring each other down for 4 minutes now

what do i do

like did they crash or something? am i supposed to reboot them?

me, frantically asking google for help: tiny loser and giant softie glaring at each other with murder in their eyes, what do?

**2007 emo kid (13:37)**

matt you work at nasa

**power of god & anime (13:37)**

my expertise is in rocket engineering not whatever the hell this is

also, i just wanna say that whoever created the phrase "at least its not rocket science" was terribly wrong

many things are harder than rocket science

take for example, taxes

the phrase should be "at least its not taxes" instead

**2007 emo kid (13:38)**

gotta love nasa matt tangents

**power of god & anime (13:38)**

always a pleasure to provide you with them

**power of god & anime (13:38)**

oh look they're moving again

**power of god & anime (13:39)**

i cann ot believe,,

after 7 min of intense staring

hunk placed a singular card down

SIX MINUTES

A SINGLE CARD

**kiss the cook (13:39)**

its called psyching your opponent out

**power of god & anime (13:39)**

its called an absolute waste of the very limited time you have here on earth

**rest in peace rover (13:39)**

hey matt thanks for very clearly exposing hunks cards in the photo u sent

**power of god & anime (13:40)**

oh fuck

**kiss the cook (13:40)**

MATTHEW

**power of god & anime (13:40)**

IM SORRY

**2007 emo kid (13:41)**

hold up

_[screenshot.jpg]_

pidge what the fuck is this

why is the tv in the background of the photo showing buzzfeed unsolved

were you watching without me?

we had a PACT

what happened to being partners in cryptid?

**rest in peace rover (13:41)**

oh fuck 

**rest in peace rover (13:42)**

look im sorry

i had a friend who was starting to get into the show so i started looking for my fave eps to rec her

and i

sort of got carried away

**2007 emo kid (13:42)**

cant believe you replaced me on my birthday

**rest in peace rover (13:42)**

oh my god

**2007 emo kid (13:42)**

homophobia at its finest

**rest in peace rover (13:42)**

keith

**2007 emo kid (13:43)**

i will never recover

**sharpshooter (13:43)**

and you guys call ME the dramatic one?

* * *

_**happy birthday dumbass** _

_(kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**power of god & anime (13:43)**

before all of you come for me

id just like to say

**power of god & anime (13:44)**

yea okay i got nothing i just wanted to delay my inevitable demise

**rest in peace rover (13:44)**

did it not occur to at least one of your 4 braincells to perhaps check the goddamn picture before sending it?

you're lucky i made up an excuse in time

**power of god & anime (13:44)**

its concerning that you're that good at lying

**sharpshooter (13:44)**

matt i literally put u in charge of babysitting hunk and making sure he doesn't spill anyth

and you pull a 180° and do the exact opposite

**princess™ (13:45)**

petition to have matt and hunk permanently banned from all future surprise plans

**sharpshooter (13:45)**

100% signed

**rest in peace rover (13:45)**

signed

**princess™ (13:45)**

signed

**space dad (13:46)**

Signed

**other space dad (13:46)**

signed!

**kiss the cook (13:46)**

Signed

**power of god & anime (13:46)**

HUNK

**kiss the cook (13:46)**

I was bound to go down soon anyways

Bringing you down w/ me is a bonus

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaAA i really intended to write about the ACTUAL PARTY in this chapter but as i said earlier i got carried away and this chapter was getting way too long already but i PROMISE the actual party will be in the next chapter 
> 
> again, thank you for all of your support on this fic!


	17. surprises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **2007 emo kid (01:50)**
> 
> so what im hearing is
> 
> you were lyiNG ABOUT FORGETTING THE BONDING MOMENT THIS ENTIRE TIME

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> what else can i say about this fic? i love them

_**other space dad + space dad** _

**other space dad (15:00)**

mission update

**space dad (15:01)**

We are not doing this

**other space dad (15:01)**

cmon babe dont you wanna be like those mission impossible style couples

**space dad (15:01)**

Thats not a thing

Have you ever watched mission impossible

**other space dad (15:02)**

thats besides the point here

we are on a MISSION

**space dad (15:02)**

All we have to do is distract keith for an hour

**other space dad (15:02)**

aka a mission!!

**space dad (15:02)**

You're overcomplicating things

**other space dad (15:03)**

i overcomplicate everything

when i realised i had feelings for you did i do the logical thing and confess to you? of course not

i overcomplicated everything and pined for you for literal years

i am the king of overcomplication

**space dad (15:03)**

I dont think thats a title you should be proud of

**other space dad (15:03)**

and what authority do you have to be telling me that

**space dad (15:03)**

I'm your boyfriend

**other space dad (15:04)**

love is a ploy

**space dad (15:04)**

Can you please just hurry back

Keiths gonna be home soon

**other space dad (15:04)**

okay fine

but you better believe im gonna be listening to the mission impossible theme song while i walk back

**space dad (15:04)**

I hope your earphones get tangled

**other space dad (15:05)**

who said anything about using earphones

**space dad (15:05)**

Dear god

* * *

_**happy birthday, dumbass** _

_(kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**princess™ (15:36)**

hunk matt where are yall?

**power of god & anime (15:36)**

at my place trying to figure out how the fuck we're gonna get this cake from point a to b

**princess™ (15:36)**

need backup?

**power of god & anime (15:37)**

we'll manage

**princess™ (15:37)**

lance?

**sharpshooter (15:37)**

had to make a detour to pick up my present

be there in five

is pidge there already?

**princess™ (15:37)**

_[#just_pidge_struggles.jpg]_

**sharpshooter (15:38)**

LMAOSHHSHS

**princess™ (15:38)**

"allura i am STRONG and CAPABLE i can do this. now hand me that scotch tape and hold this ladder steady so i can attach this goddamn banner to the ceiling."

**sharpshooter (15:38)**

i hope she slips

**princess™ (15:38)**

i read your text out loud and she almost fell off trying to flip you off

* * *

_**happy birthday, dumbass** _

_(kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**other space dad (16:12)**

CODE RED I REPEAT CODE FUCKING RED

**princess™ (16:12)**

WHAT HAPPENED

**kiss the cook (16:12)**

Please dont tell me things went wrong again i swear to

**space dad (16:12)**

I left you and keith for five minutes how did things go wrong already

**other space dad (16:13)**

_[countryboyiloveyouu.jpg]_

KOSMO MADE A FRIEND

HIS NAME IS BERRY

LOOK HOW CUTE

**princess™ (16:13)**

are you fucking kidding me

**power of god & anime (16:13)**

JSHSHSHSH I LOVE THEM

**kiss the cook (16:13)**

Two types of people ^^

**princess™ (16:13)**

YOU GUYS WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HERE 10MIN AGO

**other space dad (16:14)**

AND PRY KOSMO AWAY FROM HIS NEW FRIEND?

**space dad (16:14)**

What happened to the mission?

**other space dad (16:14)**

screw the mission this is way more fun

**princess™ (16:14)**

shiro if you dont get your husband and your sons asses back here in the next 10 minutes your vinyl collection will pay the price

**space dad (16:15)**

Bold of you to assume you can threaten me with that

* * *

_**other space dad + space dad**_

**space dad (16:15)**

Adam wylde if you dont get to the entrance in the next 10 seconds god help me

**other space dad (16:15)**

"bold of you to assume you can threaten me with that"

**space dad (16:15)**

SHUT UP IF ANYTHING HAPPENS TO ANY ONE OF MY ROLLING STONES VINYLS I WILL CRY

**other space dad (16:15)**

you're lucky i love you

* * *

_**happy birthday dumbass** _

_(kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**other space dad (16:27)**

we're two min away

**other space dad (16:28)**

coMING UP THE STAIRS NOW I REPEAT COMING UP THE STAIRSTD NOWEBHDH

**other space dad (16:28)**

AT THE DOOR

 

* * *

 

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**princess™ (16:33)**

_[gonewrong.mp4]_

THIS IS BY FAR THE BEST ONE

**sharpshooter (16:33)**

STOP LAUHGING AT MY MISERY

**2007 emo kid (16:34)**

does it still hurt?

**sharpshooter (16:34)**

take a wild guess buddy

**2007 emo kid (16:34)**

im sorry

**sharpshooter (16:34)**

soeyr doesnt help my BRUISE D NOSE

**2007 emo kid (16:35)**

yoU JUMPED OUT AT ME FROM BEHIND THE DOOR

**sharpshooter (16:35)**

thats exacky what youre supposed to do in a SURPRSIE

**rest in peace rover (16:35)**

yeah, definitely the best one yet

* * *

_**2007 emo kid + sharpshooter** _

**2007 emo kid (16:36)**

im sorry

for elbowing you in the face

are you actually mad at me

honestly

**sharpshooter (16:37)**

nah i was just bein dramatic

**2007 emo kid (16:37)**

you sure?

**sharpshooter (16:37)**

im sure

i grew up with 4 siblings

trust me

this is nothing compared to my teen years

**2007 emo kid (16:38)**

you say teen years as if you're some wise old man

**sharpshooter (16:38)**

well i AM your elder

**2007 emo kid (16:38)**

thats only what your id says

in reality you're like 9

**sharpshooter (16:39)**

which makes us on par w each other

**2007 emo kid (16:39)**

mcclain do you want your ice pack or not

**sharpshooter (16:39)**

yes please mr kogane sir

**2007 emo kid (16:40)**

did you just fucking

**sharpshooter (16:40)**

what

you got a thing for being called sir?

* * *

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**space dad (16:40)**

Why the hell did keith just stick his entire head into the 7-11 freezer while trying to get lances ice pack

**rest in peace rover (16:40)**

_[hmM.jpg]_

lance is smiling at his phone for reasons unknown

**other space dad (16:41)**

coincidence? i think not

**rest in peace rover (16:41)**

hotel? trivago

**kiss the cook (16:41)**

Sus

**princess™ (16:41)**

eyes emoji

**power of god & anime (16:42)**

did you really just type out the words eyes emoji

**princess™ (16:42)**

and what about it?

 

* * *

 

_**2007 emo kid + princess™** _

**princess™ (18:44)**

help me pick a card

**2007 emo kid (18:44)**

i see you've come to the master for help

**princess™ (18:45)**

being the best at cards against humanity isn't really an achievement to be proud of

**2007 emo kid (18:45)**

i'll let that comment slide because you helped plan this surprise for me

**princess™ (18:45)**

:)

**2007 emo kid (18:45)**

what are your options

**princess™ (18:46)**

im torn between "this groovy new thing called lsd" or "getting into a car, driving to the movie theatre and seeing the emoji movie"

**2007 emo kid (18:46)**

definitely the lsd one

**princess™ (18:46)**

thats so predictable though

**2007 emo kid (18:47)**

look, which one sounds funnier:

well if this groovy new thing called lsd is a crime, then lock me up!

OR

well if getting into a car, driving to the movie theatre and seeing the emoji movie is a crime, then lock me up!

**princess™ (18:47)**

emoji

**2007 emo kid (18:47)**

why ask for advice when you're not even gonna take it

**princess™ (18:47)**

too late

i played it

**2007 emo kid (18:48)**

well you're still gonna lose anyways

**princess™ (18:48)**

oh ho ho someones confident

whats your card

**2007 emo kid (18:48)**

you'll see

* * *

_**2007 emo kid + princess™** _

**princess™ (18:50)**

THE AUDACITY

I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU PLAYED "GAY THOUGHTS"

**2007 emo kid (18:50)**

we're all disaster gays here of course it would win

 

* * *

 

**_adashi fan club_ **

_(other space dad, power of god & anime, space dad)_

**power of god & anime (19:17)**

adam come get ur man

look @ how hes looking at matt damon

_[heart_eyes_motherfucker.jpg]_

**other space dad (19:17)**

eh, i dont hold it against him

i mean have you _seen_  matt damon?

id willingly break up with shiro if it meant he could be with him

**space dad (19:17)**

And i'd do the same for you <3

**power of god & anime (19:18)**

worlds most weirdly supportive boyfriends

although conversations about your split are gonna be really awkward

someone: so why did you guys break up?

yall: the martian (2015)

* * *

_**space rangers** _

_(2007 emo kid, kiss the cook, other space dad, power of god & anime, princess™, rest in peace rover, sharpshooter, space dad)_

**rest in peace rover (19:56)**

MY MY (DUN DUN)

**kiss the cook (19:56)**

I TRIED TO HOLD YOU BACK BUT YOU WERE STRONGER

**space dad (19:56)**

OH YEAH (DUN DUN)

**princess™ (19:57)**

AND NOW IN SEEMS MY ONLY CHANCE IS GIVING UP THE FIGHT

**power of god & anime (19:57)**

SO HOW COULD I EVER REFUSE??

**2007 emo kid (19:57)**

I FEEL LIKE I WIN WHEN I LOSE

**sharpshooter (19:57)**

I FEEL LIKE I WIN WHEN I LOOOOOSE

**other space dad (19:57)**

LANCE

YOU RUINED THE FLOW

**rest in peace rover (19:58)**

klance strikes again

**sharpshooter (19:58)**

HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW KEITH WAS ALREADY TYPING THAT

YOU GUYS ARE JUST UNREALISTICALLY COORDINATED

**space dad (19:58)**

YKNOW WHAT FUCK IT

**other space dad (19:58)**

langUAGE

**space dad (19:58)**

WATERLOO

**princess™ (19:59)**

I WAS DEFEATED YOU WON THE WAR

**other space dad (19:59)**

dooo doooooo do do do

**power of god & anime (19:59)**

WATERLOO

PROMISE TO LOVE YOU FOREVER MORE (dun dun dun dun dun dun)

**2007 emo kid (19:59)**

WATERLOO

couldn't escape if i wanted to

**kiss the cook (19:59)**

DOO DOOO DOO DO DOO

**sharpshooter (20:00)**

WATERLOO

KNOWING MY FATE IS TO BE WITH YOU

**rest in peace rover (20:00)**

woah woah WOAH WOAH

**space dad (20:00)**

WATERLOO

**power of god & anime (20:00)**

FINALLY

**kiss the cook (20:00)**

FACING

**princess (20:01)**

MY

**sharpshooter (20:01)**

WATERLOO

**2007 emo kid (20:01)**

WATERLOO

**princess™ (20:01)**

DAMMIT KLANCE

 

* * *

 

_**october 25th, 2018** _

_**2007 emo kid + sharpshooter** _

**sharpshooter (01:42)**

u up?

**2007 emo kid (01:42)**

you sound like a 13 year old trying to flirt

**sharpshooter (01:42)**

aaand im leaving

**2007 emo kid (01:42)**

thats what they all say

**sharpshooter (01:43)**

shshsgsg keith no

**2007 emo kid (01:43)**

hows your nose

**sharpshooter (01:43)**

still hurts a little but i think i'll live

**2007 emo kid (01:43)**

damn, should've hit harder

**sharpshooter (01:44)**

heY

so how'd u find your twenty-first?

**2007 emo kid (01:44)**

not as bad as it could have been

**sharpshooter (01:44)**

ouch

**2007 emo kid (01:44)**

im kidding

i really liked it

thank you

**sharpshooter (01:45)**

i mean

it was

everyones effort

glad you liked it

**2007 emo kid (01:45)**

glad i liked it too

**sharpshooter (01:45)**

soft keith makes an appearance

**2007 emo kid (01:45)**

hi there

**sharpshooter (01:46)**

is that

did you just admit

**2007 emo kid (01:46)**

im too tired to act edgy

**sharpshooter (01:46)**

so thats all it takes to bring out your soft side? a surprise party and a little bit of sleep deprivation?

**2007 emo kid (01:46)**

i guess so

**sharpshooter (01:47)**

noted for future reference

so did you like your presents?

**2007 emo kid (01:47)**

i know you just wanna know i what i think of _your_  present

**sharpshooter (01:47)**

well if you're gonna call me out for it

**2007 emo kid (01:48)**

[[starlight.jpg]](https://ae01.alicdn.com/kf/HTB1ZOBAiU1HTKJjSZFmq6xeYFXa4/Constellation-Projector-Star-Astro-Sky-Rotate-Night-Light-Projector-Lamp-LED-DIY-Starry-Light-Romantic-Home.jpg_640x640.jpg)

does that answer your question

**sharpshooter (01:48)**

wow

someone was eager to use it 

**2007 emo kid (01:48)**

i couldnt resist, okay

its really beautiful

reminds me of that one exhibit

at the space and rocket center

**sharpshooter (01:48)**

i take that as a win

**2007 emo kid (01:49)**

? take what as a win

**sharpshooter (01:49)**

we met for the first time when pidge pulled you along to go to the space n rocket center with us

you think its a coincidence i got you a constellation lamp?

**2007 emo kid (01:50)**

you remembered that?

**sharpshooter (01:50)**

we were stuck together in that faulty moon shot ride for almost an hour of course id remember

**2007 emo kid (01:50)**

so what im hearing is

you were lyiNG ABOUT FORGETTING THE BONDING MOMENT THIS ENTIRE TIME 

**sharpshooter (01:50)**

okay

well

in my defense

**2007 emo kid (01:51)**

no. i refuse. this is absolutely unacceptable.

**sharpshooter (01:51)**

i was just fucking around i didn't think you'd actually believe it

**2007 emo kid (01:51)**

"nope, dont remember, didn't happen"

how was i supposed to interpret that again?

**sharpshooter (01:51)**

will you please get over this i gave you a constellation lamp

**2007 emo kid (01:52)**

no, thats all im gonna think about whenever i turn on this lamp now

**sharpshooter (01:52)**

are you saying you're gonna have me on your mind every night before you sleep?

**2007 emo kid (01:52)**

you

you're taking words out of my mouth

**sharpshooter (01:52)**

mm, no

im pretty sure thats what was implied

**2007 emo kid (01:53)**

im going to bed

**sharpshooter (01:53)**

you can't just pull the "im going to bed" card whenever you're losing at a conversation

**2007 emo kid (01:53)**

and yet, here i am, doing just that

goodnight lance

**sharpshooter (01:53)**

gnight samurai

have sweet dreams

(about me)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in case anyones confused: the reason they suddenly break out into song nearing the end of the chapter is because they were watching the movie _the martian_ which features the iconic song _waterloo_ by abba (sorry if this chapter or any other chapter was confusing for you lol i dont have a beta reader so it might be hard to follow sometimes)


End file.
